The title of this recording is "Dusty - South". It is described as: Dusty talks about growing up and being out in Dunedin. It was recorded in Dunedin, Otago on the 8th May 2014. The duration of the recording is 29 minutes, but this may not reflect the actual length of the event. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: In this podcast Dusty talks about growing up and being out in Dunedin. The content in the recording covers the 2010s decade. A brief summary of the recording is: The podcast titled "Dusty - South" is a 29-minute recording featuring an individual discussing their experiences of growing up and living as part of the LGBTQ+ community in Dunedin, Otago. The recording, made on May 8th, 2014, captures the significant cultural and societal shifts in attitudes toward queer identities in the South Island of New Zealand, particularly during the 2010s. Throughout the discussion, the speaker addresses the changes in the language and attitudes surrounding the LGBTQ+ community, reflecting on the gradual shift from negative and euphemistic terminologies to a more neutral or accepting lexicon. They share personal anecdotes about coming to terms with their own sexual orientation during high school, the influences of their peers, and the comfort they found in the less formal processes of coming out. The individual speaks candidly about the rampant homophobia encountered during their early years of education, recounting daily verbal abuse and the deep impact it had on their mental health, leading to suicidal ideation. It's noted, however, that as peers matured, the occurrence of such homophobic bullying lessened, suggesting a correlation between maturity and tolerance. Despite the challenges faced in high school, the speaker indicates a lack of specialized support for queer students, with only generic anti-bullying resources available. The idea that a Queer Straight Alliance group might have been helpful, even if just on principle, is briefly entertained. Differences in the visibility and acceptance of queer individuals in smaller communities such as Dunedin compared to larger cities are also discussed. The individual laments the missed sex education due to being overseas, speculating on the content's neutrality concerning sexual orientation. The conversation delves into the mixed feelings the speaker has about queer community groups, which they found unrelatable due to a perceived attention-seeking behavior among some members, leading to a sense of isolation. The speaker also contrasts their high school experience with that of university life, noting the pronounced decrease in bullying and the increased social support available at institutions of higher learning. They touch on the existence of groups and gatherings that aim to foster a sense of community, such as the "Q4," but still feel disconnected due to shyness and social anxiety. Further topics discussed include the representation of LGBTQ+ individuals in the media, where the speaker notices progress but also a lack of nuanced and relatable queer characters. They particularly highlight the positive impact of Macklemore's song "Same Love" and the societal advancements such as marriage equality that the song coincided with. The podcast concludes with the individual expressing the hope that future generations will normalize and accept the spectrum of queer identities more readily. They share a sense of satisfaction in knowing that their generation is potentially the most liberated and accepted in history while acknowledging the ongoing struggles elsewhere, such as in Russia. The full transcription of the recording begins:  Um how do you describe your identity? I'm gay. Do you think the language that we've used about our identities has changed much over time? Yeah, definitely, I think. Well, maybe not. Gays describing themselves or queer people describing themselves, um, other people describing us has definitely changed from being a really negative thing. Like or a really euphemistic thing. Like flowery or something like that. A long time ago to being neutral or like yeah, to be gay or queer is being more neutral. I think queer is entering the non queer community vocabulary a lot more these days. And when did you first become aware of your sexual orientation? Um, quite young. It's embarrassing, but I was in denial for a long time, like I'm, like, really obviously gay. Um, but I was still yeah, in denial about it for a long time. But in year 12, 1 of my friends, um didn't really, like, come out. He just, like, started going out and having sex with boys and then, like talking about it without, like, saying I'm gay, everyone. So that sort of that definitely made me feel comfortable to, like, talk about the same thing without coming out. So it was like a nice, easy transition. Yeah, really easy, actually. So cool. Um, when did you start? Kind of telling people, or maybe showing, Um, probably year 13. So when I was 17, what kind of reactions did you get from people? Oh, everyone already knew because I'm, like, really camped, but, um, yeah, no surprise at all. You had always known Did you experience any kind of homophobia? Um, in high school? Yeah, a lot. Um, every day I was, like, really miserable. I wanted to kill myself every day because, um, everyone was horrible to me. They just would like when I was walking past it, like, say, like, faggot and stuff, stuff like that to me all day, every day, Um, until maybe like year 11. Um, so it wasn't really the people in my year as much. Maybe the people in the year above me, and then when it got to about year 10 or year 11, they sort of, like, got over it. And then the people in the year below me started doing it. Um, but yeah, definitely. By year, 13 like that would never happen to me at high school, and year 12 didn't really ever happen. So yeah, they just needed to, like, grow up and get over it. Yeah. So do you think that was because people were maturing or is it to do it all with how you were, like, feeling more confident or probably just the other people like it probably just wasn't fun anymore, I guess for them because they, like, grow up. Yeah. Um And did your school ever kind of do anything about it, or was there any support for people like you? Um, there wasn't like any, like queer support in particular. But there was, like bullying support, I guess in general, just like the guidance counsellor And like, tell a teacher or something like that. But when I was young, it was just so Oh, what's the word like Universal That it was like I couldn't have told on every single person. There were just too many, and I didn't even know what any of them Really. But, um by like, year 11 or 12 when it would like, occasionally happen, then I would, like tell on them and they would get in trouble. So yeah, they they definitely weren't like to me or anything like that. Um, do you think there could have been, like, a cool impact if there was a, like, a quest Alliance group or anything like that in your school? Um, I don't think anyone would have joined it, but if there was, like, they had people in it definitely. Yeah. Whereabouts. Did you go to school? Um, in Dunedin. What do you think? It's like being a young person in the South Island. Do you think there's kind of differences? Hm. I guess so. There are probably a lot less queer people here, Um, than in, like, bigger places like Christchurch, Wellington, especially Auckland. Um, I don't know. Yeah, I guess so. Did you have any, um, education in your health classes around sexual orientation or gender stuff? Uh, I was overseas when we did sex education, so Yeah, I missed out on that, but probably I think it's probably pretty neutral. Yeah, I'm not sure. Um, have you been involved with any, like, queer community groups or anything like that? No. I tried going to one in high school, but, um, all the people there just seemed really like young and immature and like, kind of trashy. Like they just sort of, like, broke all the rules. And, like, they, for example, they weren't allowed to smoke during this, like, one hour. So, like, halfway through, they'd all go out and, like, smoke with each other outside. And I'd sort of sit there by myself. And I just had nothing in common with them at all. And they were, like, for them, being gay was like their whole identity, and they sort of seemed kind of attention seeking in it. Um, and I just didn't I didn't feel a part of that at all, so I guess it was really good for them because they had each other, but yeah, I. I didn't feel a part of it, so that's like my problem, not theirs. Um, So did you feel quite isolated when you were younger and you were sexual orientation? Definitely. Yeah, like, yeah, Absolutely. Did you know any many other, um, gay or queer people at your school? Um, yeah. So, like, there was the one other guy that I mentioned before. Um, so we were like friends, and we only started being, like, really good friends in year 11 or 12 because I think most of his other friends dropped out of high school. Um um, but yeah, just one out of a school of, like, 1000 people. What do you think was stopping people from being open about their sexuality? Because obviously, we end up being more than I think. Even like when I was at high school. So not even 10 years ago. 567 years ago when I was, like, in year 11 or whatever. Um, it just wasn't as acceptable in a high school setting. Like, if you were, like, grown up, then that's OK, because everyone else doesn't care because they're grown up and mature about it. But, um, like, I was bullied every day all day. Um, so yeah, why? Why would you subject yourself to that when you could Not if you could, like, hide or whatever. Were your family kind of aware that you didn't have to tell them? Yeah, definitely. I. I knew that both my parents were like, they're both really liberal, and I knew they wouldn't care at all. Yeah, which is, like, really lucky when you compare it to like people being thrown out of their home and abandoned by their family for something so trivial. Um, so what's it been like? Um, coming to university and being queer at university compared to being at high school on a different day? No, I don't think I've ever been bullied at university. I don't think anyone is bullied at university, and no one should be like. No one should be bullied at high school. But definitely no one should be bullied at university. Everyone's an adult. Um, yeah, it's been fine. It's been good. I really like university. Been a student for a long time. Um and what support or kind of social opportunities? Or are there at the University of China? Um, I think there's a lot. Um, there's a thing that happens every Wednesday called Q four for two hours, which is like a coffee and cookies chatting session. Yeah. Um, and I did used to go to that a few times in, like, first. Or maybe, I think just in first year. But, um, like I've been at uni so long, probably not a single person who was there then is still there now, and I don't know, I just felt kind of awkward like talking to any of those people like it wasn't like my high school group where I had nothing in common with them. But I'm, like, really shy and awkward with people I don't know normally, especially if it's like me versus a group. Um and yeah, I never really knew how to talk to anyone. I never No one ever really came and talked to me. So I stopped going, and now I feel way too awkward to go, and I don't think I really need to go. I think like a lot of people do go, and it's like, good for them, but yeah, I don't think I need it right now. Um, is it important to to have kind of like a sense of that community or belonging to a group in relation to being gay? Or, um, I think for me, not so much, but I think it really helps a lot of people like even the ones at the high school group that I was at, like I'm sure they really, really like valued it, even though I didn't so it's good that they had it for them, but I don't know, I sort of feel like I don't really fit in with the gay community, Believe it or not. Um, yeah. So no, but for all the people who do use it, which is, like dozens scores, whatever, it is really important to them. I'm sure. Um I'm interested in what you said about not fitting in with the gay community. It's weird. I don't really understand why. Um, I've only ever, uh, in addition to that, the Q four, coffee thing. There's, like, gay party event things. Um and I think one of them, I think they're 32 or three, and one of them is run by the university or the university group. I'm not really sure, because I've only ever been to one of them twice with, like, three years apart. And that was like, a year ago. Um, yeah, it doesn't seem like something the university would really be like encouraging, but yeah, they're there. And lots of people go. Let's say, like, most of the queer people in Dunedin would would go to would go to some of them semi regularly or the youth of Dunedin anyway. Yeah, and some of them not so youthful, but yeah. Anyway, sorry. Your latest question. Yeah. So what? What is it? Do you think about about you or about the community that makes you not feel like you fit? I don't know. It's not like I'm embarrassed or anything. It's not like you're gay. I don't want to be associated with you. Um, I think it's just the me versus the group thing and not feeling comfortable. And I'd sort of need someone to approach me and start talking to me. And I'm, like, not very friendly. I don't This is so embarrassing, but I like probably because I grew up feeling so like, isolated. I don't know. This is a bit like pseudo pop psychology. Um, I've like, yeah, I'm not friendly. Even if I'm feel like I'm nice or doing something nice, it's not in a friendly way. And I'm, like, trying really hard to change. But probably if someone did come up and talk to me, I'd probably be like one word. Blunt answers, thinking that I was being friendly, but actually really not being, um so yeah, I think it's probably that but then I feel like he's been away from the gay community or like not a part of it for so long that it would be really awkward to go back. I'm I'm really awkward in general. Um, do you have kind of outside of, like, the groups or events or do you have other just gay friends? Yeah, Um, I've got a few. I don't have as many as I used to, and I never really see them that they're mainly just like my friends on Facebook, who I used to hang out with sometimes. And now I just like, like their statuses when cool things happen to them. Um, I'm trying to think how many I have, like not very many at all. One of my my best friend who's a girl, was surprised lesbian recently. So that sort of, like added one unintentionally. Um, but I'm trying to think 23 like hardly any. Oh, no, maybe about like five. But one of them is like in Florida. One is in Wellington like, Yeah, so, I. I don't hang out with them either. So if you could, like, envision things like differently for you like, would it Would it be that that would be something that was more like if it didn't involve you having to put yourself out there. Kind of. It was a lot easier. Not so awkward. Yeah, probably. I'd probably still feel awkward. Um, but yeah, I don't know, like there's no reason that I wouldn't want to be friends with them. I don't There's no reason that I remove myself or anything like that. Just a, um, does or has social media play a part at all and kind of connecting with other people. So there's a Facebook group. It's like a secret group, so, like no one can see that you're in it or anything like that. So there's no downside to being in it. Um, we basically everyone queer at university as a member of that group. So, um, it's just like there's a lot of people. So I guess it's nice that it's not just like two people, because then you'd feel really alone. Um, so, yeah, that's really good. Um, because all you normally have to do is like meet one gay person at uni, and then they'll, like, add you to that group, and then you meet all of them, and then you go to like, the queer coffee thing and then you go to the gay parties, and then you're like a full part of the community. Um, so, yeah, definitely. I think it's really easy to become involved with all of that. I don't know why, but didn't How do you feel about the representation of, um, current Trans people in the media? Oh, well, it's definitely changed a lot since I was at high school. Like when I was at high school. I finished in 2008. So that was a while ago. Six years ago. Um, so maybe 10 years ago, when I roughly started and was going through intermedia and stuff, it's basically like I felt like there was nothing. Um, and I definitely felt like if any sort of actor or singer that came out then their career would be over just like that. And now that's so like, that's so different. Um, people are coming out left, right, and centre. Um, yeah. And so, in terms of like, positive role models and the wider media, not so much like the news. Definitely. I don't really like follow the news, but, um, I know that stuff dot co dot NZ like it seems to have lots of, like, queer themed stuff like it's not like a queer thing. It's like a mainstream thing. But I mainly know that from the commenters who are like, there's so much gay stuff on here. It's so annoying and stuff like that, and I just laugh at them. So you see lots of on there. Um, yeah, but just I think not so much people like criticising gays, just criticising stuff for having too much of, like this one minority on their thing, which is like, I'm sure if you calculate the proportion of, like, queer themed stories to non queer themed stories, it's probably like 1%. But yeah. Um, do you see your identity reflected in the media like people like you and, um, looking at media is Yeah, like the news books, TV, movies, music? Yes, I guess in like, fictional things. Not really. Like I'm trying to think of movies that have gay people. I don't really watch like gay themed movies as much, but like mean girls. You've got Damien, who's like, really fat and ugly, um in cos I can't also cos um but yeah, I guess not really. I'm sure it's like improving all the time. There's this new movie called My gay BFF or something. Do you know about that? Yeah, I saw the trailer for that, and that looks interesting, but, um, I don't know. I feel like the media has this sort of pressure to, um, be really PC around, like portraying, portraying gay people and so that they have to. They can't, like, use gay stereotypes unless it's like a comedy thing. So if there's like a gay character, they're probably like a straight character, because if they made them like camp at all or anything like that, then they'd be criticised for perpetuating, perpetuating stereotypes and stuff like that. So, um, I think you sort of see and fiction really like camp Gaze. Especially like in older stuff. Or like really, um, straight acting gays. Not really anything in between, but it's probably changing like, yeah, don't consume much media. Sorry. Oh, but songs like you never have a song by a guy about a girl. And like the only song that I can think of except Rihanna's song, I can't even remember what it's called, where she's like seeing about this girl who's like into her, but she isn't like Liz. So she isn't like into it. Like she's like. No, um, is the song that Mamore sampled? I think I've seen the video for it, but I can't actually remember the name of the original song. But yeah, the song that I love is is the song that was sampled called Same Love Two. Do you? Yeah. Yeah, that one. That's the only song that I can think of by a woman about, like, loving a woman. But it's, like, not really mainstream, like only, like, the only reason I've ever heard of it is because of Macklemore. Yeah, but like, I think that that song is really cool. Like Red made a huge difference, I think to me and to everyone, I think, Um, do you mean Mare's one or one? Yeah. Do you want to talk a bit more about that kind of put the messages in that song out and have that. Yeah. So, like the video? What a tear joker. Um, but yeah, I think the video is good because, like, both the characters are sort of in between. Like when I was saying like, they're not really camp, but they're not really straight like you don't hear them talking and or in the like, Mardi Gras or whatever. Um, they're just like ordinary. I sort of people wee bit effeminate so that you can sort of understand that they're game just by looking at them, and they're just like, living out their lives. They do, like, get some hate in the video, like from the parents. But then, like the mom obviously gets over it because she walks her son down the aisle. Um, and just like when they're walking down the street like they get, like, shoved by someone walking past, which I think was good because good to show that because if they were just like everything was fine, then it wouldn't be believable, especially for someone like their age, like in their late twenties in America. Um, but yeah, it's just it's like, gives you hope just by like watching the video. And that song was really, like, successful. And at the same time, I don't sort of around the world. There was, like, the Gay Marriage Equality Movement and, like it succeeded in New Zealand. It succeeded in a lot of places, so yeah, it was just like really good video, Really good song became popular and it was like at a really opportune time. And I think it's the first time I've ever yeah heard a song about, like, a gay theme song that was popular. Yeah, um, some people, I think, like, criticised that song because it's, um because it's written by a straight man. And he's kind of getting all this popularity for writing a song about the gay community. And it seems to like this quite this, um, two sided thing where some people are like, Oh, it's so amazing And it's got all this popularity and it's Yeah, it's giving people hope and it's it's gonna be great. And some people are like, um what about the queer artists, like getting recognition for their songs and this kind of street man telling a story kind of thing. What do you think of that? OK, I think that you can think read too much into anything, criticise anything. No one's perfect. Nothing's perfect. Um, you know, you could criticise the Green Party for not being environmental enough, but I think you've got to take it or you can get it and I'm sure, like one example of that song. Furthering a gay artist's career is like my one view on YouTube of Mary Lambert's original song. Um, I think that we can take all the help. We we need all the help we can get, and I think to criticise someone for being straight is homophobic. Well, sexually. What's the word sexual orientation phobic or or whatever? It's I don't know. I think that criticism, like that doesn't get anyone anywhere. It's just sort of like to me, it's like a really academic sort of waste of time thing. Like maybe we can discuss all this later when queer people have full of equality and stuff like that. Um, but I just don't don't think it's helpful. Like some gay artists make a really popular song. Then, like it's up to you to make a song that everyone wants to listen to. Yeah. Um, And how do you feel about marriage? Equality? Passing? Oh, it's awesome. Yeah, I want to get married. I'm not happy that it's going to be a marriage. You know, it looks like a marriage, but isn't, um were you involved at all like, did you write a submission. Celebrate the readings. Anything like that. Probably wrote a submission by, like, you know, pressing. Send at a preprepared one. signed petitions. Definitely. Stuff like that. Not really pretty passive. Um, but yeah, it seemed like it was going to be now or in 20 years, and yeah, it's really cool that I have it now. Um, So you want to get married? What else do you see in your future? What do you want to do after you finish? I mean, well, I study law, and I want to be a lawyer. Um, yeah, that's all, um probably want to travel. Probably, like, really boring. Like I don't want to conquer the world or climb Mount Everest or become prime minister or anything like that. Just want to have, like, a really boring middle class life, buy a house, get some babies somehow. I don't know how. Um yeah, what do you think are some of the most important issues that are facing current trans use in New Zealand at the moment, I think trends is the really big thing. Like even I'm, like, really embarrassed to admit it. But even I sort of feel uncomfortable when I see a transgender person because, like people, I don't really understand why I have this fear of difference, which is obviously why queer people are facing, like, prejudice and stuff like that for so long. Um, because we're different. But yeah, so like me, like a really gay person. Feeling uncomfortable That's so bad. Like, I feel ashamed of that every time. Like I feel that way and people just need to get over it and like the whole word weird. What does that even mean? Like you just say all the time? That's weird. It's like So it's different to you, like, what does that matter? But people just say, like, that's weird and goodbye Discount it forever. Um, so, yeah, I think people will need to somehow get over it. And transgender people need to be accepted because, like when gay people started coming out, you found out that there are so many of them and like, there are probably lots of transgender people like who just hide because it's so much easier like that. Yeah. Um, do you see any solutions to to that? To getting it accepted? Don't know. It's always easier to start with the Children like Hitler did with the Hitler youth. Um, because the like, when you're a child, nothing matters. Like, you know, um, like everything that we find weird and like, stuff like that they don't because we're trained to be the way that we are. So if you like, I don't know, teach them that it's normal, then they'll believe it. And they'll grow up like that, Just like our generation has grown up believing that being like gay or queer is normal because we're not abnormal, you know, whereas our parents were taught or our grandparents or whatever, we were taught the opposite. So that's how they grow up feeling. See, It's just, I think, a generational thing. I don't really know what else could happen except more more transgender people. But find me some transgender people. We need to list the numbers. I don't know. I don't know. Sorry. Um, and what's a message that you would give to, um, young people who might be struggling through some of the things that you went through? I think it's better to like cliche, but yeah, I it was so miserable during like high school. Um, especially like junior high. I and I'm so happy now, Like everything changed. It's like, Yeah, I was awesome. Um, can you kind of pinpoint any, like, moment or things that made that change in? Yeah. So it was mainly one. Mainly, a lot of it was just, like stopping being bullied at high school. Um, because they grew up, the bullies grew up and, like, didn't care anymore. Wasn't fun anymore. Um, probably mainly that. But at the same time, I had, like, really hard, thick skin then. So, like, people would be calling me, like, faggot and cock sucker, I don't know stuff like that just walking down the hallway at school and I like, didn't care. It was yeah, just bounced off. But then when something like that happened in year 12, like once a month or once every six months or something like, it really hurt me because, like, the walls had come down because I didn't need them anymore. Um, so, yeah, at the same time, it was getting better. But when it happened, it affected me a lot more. But year 13, I had a really fun year. Like I had a boyfriend in year 13 so that made me really happy for a while and then really sad when we broke up really quickly. Um, it was a really big deal for me at the time. Um And then the year after I finished high school was up until the end, the happiest year of my life. I just felt so happy. I had a gap here and I felt so happy to have, like, no responsibility of NC A like, not that it's that challenging. Um, yeah, I was still, like, living at home, so I had no rent. I had no bills like I had nothing tied me down. I felt so free and really happy. Yeah, I just felt like, instantly happy. For some reason, I don't really know why. Um, yeah, My happiness is more than the sum of its parts. I just felt really happy. Um, and maybe to finish up, um, what's your favourite thing about being a young person? And, um Well, when I was younger, I really enjoyed scamming on guys with my girlfriends. That was really fun. Um, but I guess for me today, I just know that I've got it better than any other gay person in history. And that's true of, like, Western civilization. Um, yeah, so that that's like, really satisfying. But then, at the same time, I feel really sad because you look at Russia and they've got, like, the complete opposites, so underrated. It's the new Holocaust. Um, and no one cares. No one's doing anything about it. Um, but yeah, In general, I feel really satisfied. I. I feel like I've got every opportunity that any gay person's ever had to do what I want to be happy, live normal lives. The full transcription of the recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. The tags are seperated by a semi-colon: 2010s ; Aotearoa New Zealand ; Christchurch ; Dunedin ; Florida ; France ; G. B. F. (Gay Best Friend) ; Green Party ; It Gets Better ; Macklemore ; Marriage Amendment Act (2012) ; Marriage Equality ; Mary Lambert ; Mean Girls (movie) ; Otago ; People ; Q4 (Queer Coffee at Four) ; Rule Foundation ; Russia ; South (series) ; Stuff ; Tabby Besley ; UniQ (Otago) ; Wellington ; Youth ; acting ; belonging ; books ; bullying ; camp ; career ; change ; children ; class ; coffee ; comedy ; coming out ; community ; denial ; difference ; education ; effeminate ; equality ; facebook. com ; faggot ; family ; fat ; fear ; friends ; fun ; future ; gay ; grandparents ; growing up ; guidance ; happiness ; hate ; health ; history ; hit ; homophobia ; homophobic bullying ; hope ; identity ; internet ; isolation ; journey ; labels ; ladies ; language ; law ; lawyer ; mainstream ; marriage ; marriage equality ; mary ; media ; middle class ; minority ; movies ; music ; news ; normal ; opportunity ; other ; parents ; parties ; passive ; plan ; podcast ; politics ; prejudice ; psychology ; queen ; queer ; queer straight alliance (QSA) ; rage ; recognition ; relationships ; representation ; role model ; running ; sad ; school ; sex ; sex education ; sexual orientation ; sexuality ; singing ; social ; social media ; social networking ; stereotypes ; straight ; study ; submission ; suicide ; support ; teacher ; time ; trans ; transgender ; transition ; travel ; university ; video ; walking ; writing ; youth. The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/south_dusty.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  For more details visit their website https://tiaki.natlib.govt.nz/#details=ecatalogue.1089595. Please note that this document may contain errors or omissions - you should always refer back to the original recording to confirm content.