The title of this recording is "Snapshot 2000 - Calvin". It is described as: Calvin talks about coming out and first sexual experience. It was recorded in New York City, United States of America on the 14th January 2000. This is an interview between a partially identified voice and interviewer Gareth Watkins.  Their name is spelt correctly but may appear incorrectly spelt later in the document. The duration of the recording is 8 minutes. A list of correctly spelt content keywords and tags can be found at the end of this document. A brief description of the recording is: Calvin talks about coming out and first sexual experience. The content in the recording covers the 1980s decade. A brief summary of the recording is: The audio recording titled "Snapshot 2000 - Calvin" presents an interview captured on January 14th, 2000, in New York City, featuring an individual identified as Calvin, in conversation with interviewer Gareth Watkins. The discussion, spanning eight minutes, delves into Calvin's personal narrative about coming to terms with their sexual orientation, their initial experiences, and the challenges they face with their identity in relation to societal expectations and family dynamics. At the outset, Calvin shares a retrospective insight, believing that sexual orientation is innate rather than learned. Recounting adolescent years, Calvin describes an attraction to men that came to light at the age of 15, which prompted a journey of self-acceptance. As a college student dependent on parental support, Calvin is cautious about coming out, opting to wait until a more self-sufficient stage in life is reached. Connecting through online platforms offered a safe space to explore their identity, where Calvin found the opportunity to meet others and validate personal feelings in a hidden environment away from their immediate social circle. Calvin's exchange with Gareth depicts the navigation through a critical time of their life, highlighting the formative experience of meeting someone online, which led to a first date, an emotional connection, and a revealing moment about sexual preferences gleaned through comparison of different forms of adult media. This meeting is described as influential, enabling Calvin to contend with a conflicting desire for both genuine connection and the exploration of identity through various sexual experiences. The person acknowledges the internal conflict that arises from societal pressures, as the drive for acceptance pushes against the need for personal truth, evident by attempts to present as conventionally heterosexual among peers. Candidly, Calvin speaks about the spectrum of experiences with different partners following that initial interaction. Their story surfaces the challenge in recreating that initial tenderness and underscores the significance of mutual care and respect in relationships. This realization about the nature of intimacy and sexuality beyond physical acts informs Calvin's perspective on what truly constitutes a fulfilling sexual experience. Furthermore, Calvin emphasizes a poignant and pragmatic approach to coming out, advocating for others to consider their own stability and readiness before doing so. The candid discussion draws attention to the anticipated parental response, with a particular focus on the potential impact of coming out on their mother's expectations and the cultural conception of what is deemed a 'normal' life path. The recording concludes without a resolution to Calvin's internal dilemma - whether to disclose their true self to their aging parents. The contemplation of sparing one's family from disappointment and societal pressure is a relatable concern faced by many in similarly delicate situations. The full transcription of the recording begins:  I think that some people are born gay. You are not. You know you don't learn to be gay. Because when I was really young, uh, when I see some handsome guys, I would like get an interaction. But I didn't realise that, you know, I have, like, feeling for guys. Until when I was my first year in high school, like I only 15. So that's when I started to accept myself as someone who is feeling for guys and not for girls. Um, I'm in the closet, you know, I don't go out, and none of my friends know that I'm gay. So I have to go to the Internet to meet someone you know, and chat room and stuff. And I also go to some porn site, and that really excites me. And I compare the, um, gay porn and straight porn. And that's when I realised that what I really want, uh, what my sexual preference is. So, um, that's why And then when I met the first guy on the Internet, we had coffee, and then we talk and we had we really had fun. So So that's how I realised that that's what I really want. And I won't be happy being with girls. Um, because of my age, I'm only 19. I'm still in, um, college and my parents. They I don't think I think they will accept me as a homosexual eventually, but not easily so. And they're still supporting me financially. So, um, I'm waiting till I graduate from college and get a job and settle down to tell everyone you know. So I think that's gonna be a big thing, But I, I am gonna tell them eventually because my mother is always expecting me to, uh, marry someone and have kids and stuff. So I think that's gonna be a big disappointment for her. But I have to tell her because I won't be happy if you know, if I do what she wants me to do. So the first time was, uh I think in, uh, 97 like, around October 97 I met that guy on the Internet. Uh, he's British, and, um, I talked to him. And then, like, I was trying to experience what gay, uh, sexes. And, uh, I talked to him and I went to his apartment, and then we talk and then we get really interested in each other. So, um, we did kiss. And then, um, we went to or or And then, um, I didn't know anything about anything at all. I was kind of know and wanting to experience stuff. And I told him, like I as I seen in a porn, I want to have anal sex. And then he said he won't do it because, um um I think, uh, you know, he he is really He sort of cares for me because I'm still a virgin and he he he has a very big endowment. So he's one of the best gay guy that I've ever seen, and I think I'll never see him again. And then, um, I forgot to get his address. So I didn't email him or anything, and then so I sort of wanted to experience other guys. I don't I. I don't know. I think it's not right. But many gay people do that, and I think this is what I sometimes I think it's what life is about seeing a lot of different guys, which is why a lot of us wind up getting AIDS or HIV so um I went to see a, uh, like, a couple more several guys. Um, but I didn't feel the same way as the first time. They weren't gentle, you know? So I think it's really hard to find someone like that first guy again. But, uh uh, I don't know. I still want to experience with, uh, several more guys, you know, to have different experience, but they just don't feel the same as my first time. It's memorable. And it's really what love making is all about. Not like other times. Um, what I feel what I really want is a gentle and romantic stuff. It's not. It has nothing to do with, like, sex, but the way he touches you like it just feels so good. I think this is what all sex is about. It doesn't have to be an sex or oral sex. So, um, after having sex with a lot of guys with just, like excitement and what you see in the porn, I feel that this is not all what sex is about. Well, I think that, uh, coming out, um, it doesn't have to be like you don't have to come out. You know, like I don't know if I accept myself gay, uh, like socially because, um, like, I try to be with a lot of my my friends that are girls so that, you know, to work with them so that so that, like people would like, look at me as socially normal here because the homo, like the number of homosexual people, is, you know, are very small. So they think that what heterosexual is normal and, oh, we are not normal. So II, I don't know. I don't know. Like I do want to accept myself as homosexual, but like in my mind, I just I don't know. I just can't control it. Like I want to be with girls to let people see that I do have girlfriends. I'm not real, you know, I'm not, uh, like, don't let them suspect about myself and stuff, so I don't know why I did that, but, uh, I do, except I I'm so confused. But I think I eventually will come out sometimes to tell all my friends because I don't feel good keeping all the stuff myself. So I tell them sometimes, uh, but it will be after college So, um, I would suggest that people just coming out like after they settle down or everything. Because a lot of people, this is a very new thing. A lot of people don't accept that. So my parents, they are very kind of old fashioned, so they haven't been, uh, exposed to what homosexual is about. So it's gonna be really, really new to them. I can't imagine what my mom would feel. She would be really, really disappointed. My dad, I think he would understand. And my mom would even eventually understand. But it would be really, really hard. It would take a lot a long time for her to accept me because she has such so much hope for me. And like, according to them, like heterosexual is what the life, you know, should be so Oh, I can't imagine how I'm gonna tell them. Oh, and my my parents are really old now. I'm the youngest. My dad is about 60 now, So sometimes I thought about not telling them because they only have, like, uh, you know, they won't. Well, you know, they are pretty old now, so just like, forget about that and stuff. So uh I don't know if I still need to tell, but But if they find out in some other way, like, find out my personal life, like, find out, then I will tell them. But if they don't find out, then I would try to avoid that. Uh, you know, as far as I can, because I don't want to hurt that feeling, so I think it's better not to tell them. The full transcription of the recording ends. A list of keywords/tags describing the recording follow. These tags contain the correct spellings of names and places which may have been incorrectly spelt earlier in the document. The tags are seperated by a semi-colon: 1980s ; Job ; New York City ; People ; Snapshot 2000 ; Stuff ; United States of America ; anal sex ; coffee ; coming out ; email ; family ; friends ; fun ; gay ; growing up ; heterosexual ; homosexual ; hope ; internet ; normal ; other ; parents ; romantic ; scene ; school ; sex ; straight ; time ; wind ; work ; youth. The original recording can be heard at this website https://www.pridenz.com/snapshot_2000_calvin.html. The master recording is also archived at the Alexander Turnbull Library in Wellington, New Zealand.  For more details visit their website https://tiaki.natlib.govt.nz/#details=ecatalogue.1089388. Please note that this document may contain errors or omissions - you should always refer back to the original recording to confirm content.