Spiritual Side Of Marriage (Press, 27 July 1976)

On 27 July 1976, Rev. Felix Donnelly, a senior lecturer in community health at the Auckland Medical School, responded to concerns raised by a reader, Anna Holmes, regarding his earlier address at the biennial conference of the College of General Practitioners. Holmes had expressed her dismay over an article titled "New Zealanders for sex," which suggested that mere physical sexual expertise could enhance personal relationships and marriages. In her letter published in "The Press," Holmes argued that society's overfocus on materialism and physical needs has led to a disintegration of meaningful human connections. She posited that this disintegration stemmed from neglecting the spiritual aspect of human existence, which should be addressed through love, an essential teaching of Christ. Holmes cautioned that reliance on sexology experts might diminish personal responsibility and potentially enslave individuals to the expectations of such specialists, rather than empowering them. In his reply, Father Donnelly affirmed Holmes's comments on the importance of the spiritual dimensions of life. He explained that throughout his discussions on sexuality, he has consistently underscored that the capacity to love and be loved is crucial to human happiness. His lecture aimed to enlighten doctors about the barriers that individuals face in expressing love and forming intimate relationships, particularly in cases of sexual dysfunction. Donnelly clarified that his focus during the conference was to aid clinicians in understanding how best to support those struggling with sexual issues. He pointed out the vital risk associated with taking full responsibility for a patient’s well-being, a theme he repeatedly emphasized in his teachings at the Auckland Medical School. He reiterated that physical sexual prowess, without accompanying emotional and spiritual engagement, does not guarantee strong marriages or fulfilling human relationships. Overall, Father Donnelly’s response highlighted the necessity of addressing the whole person—body, mind, and spirit—in discussions about sexuality and relationships, advocating for a more integrated approach in healthcare and personal interactions.

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