A 16-part podcast series produced by Hohou Te Rongo Kahukura and Rainbow Hub Waikato. The team set out to explore the experiences of Takatāpui and Rainbow elders. They wanted to identify specific risks of elder abuse, neglect, and exploitation. Alongside this, they wanted to advocate for the meaningful inclusion of the needs of Takatāpui and Rainbow older people in strategies, policies, and services for the elderly in Aotearoa. For more information visit the Hohou Te Rongo Kahukura website.
Summary
The audio recording highlights several significant and personal reflections on sex, relationships, and societal attitudes. The speaker delves into their experiences and observations, touching on various aspects of sexuality, consent, and social dynamics, particularly within the LGBTQ+ community.
The speaker begins by discussing the concept of predatory behavior and the difficulty of addressing it within their social network. They note that their attempts to raise awareness about consent and predatory actions were met with backlash, indicating a general lack of understanding or willingness to confront these issues. This resistance highlights a broader societal challenge in recognizing and addressing predatory behavior, not only in heterosexual contexts but also within the LGBTQ+ community.
Moving to a more personal note, the speaker reflects on their return to Rotorua and the impact it had on their sex and love life. They express a sense of resignation and cynicism about the possibility of future relationships, stating that they are content with their own company and have adapted to a life without the intimate connections they once sought. This change is partly attributed to living with family, which imposes constraints on privacy and the ability to bring partners home.
The speaker also touches on the complexities of casual and anonymous sex, which they acknowledge engaging in when necessary. They note a significant difference in their ability to pursue such interactions depending on their location. In Rotorua, they could potentially engage in casual sex if they wished, but they express concerns about the lack of consent and predatory behavior they observe in many sexual interactions within their community. The speaker links this issue to the MeToo movement, recognizing its role in raising awareness about sexual violence and predatory behavior but criticizing the delay in addressing these issues among gay and bisexual men.
Pornography is another topic the speaker discusses, particularly the challenges of consuming it while living with family. The presence of family members in close quarters, including their niece and father, creates an environment where watching porn feels inappropriate and uncomfortable. This restriction adds to the feeling of being unable to fully express or explore their sexual identity in their current living situation.
Reflecting on their past, the speaker recalls a time when they had a healthy and active sex life, which has significantly changed. They mention the role of dating apps like Grindr and Scruff, which they describe as both a necessity and a source of frustration. These apps, while providing a platform for sexual interactions, also contribute to a superficial and sometimes harmful portrayal of gay relationships, where sex is often prioritized over meaningful connections.
The speaker also observes the challenges faced by older individuals within the LGBTQ+ community, particularly those who may have come out later in life. There is a noted discrepancy between their chronological age and their experience in the gay community, leading to a unique dynamic where older individuals might attempt to relive their youth through the lens of contemporary gay culture. This situation can be disheartening, as it often results in unrealistic expectations and a skewed understanding of relationships.
This summary is created using Generative AI. Although it is based on the recording's transcription, it may contain errors or omissions. Click here to learn more about how this summary was created.
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