Like everyone right now, it's hard for Mr Urge Bear winner Arfa Bear to think of much else other than the quake which has shattered Christchurch. He shares his love for the city, before tackling a few 'get to know you' questions for GayNZ.com. "My thoughts and love goes to all those in Christchurch, luckily for me all my friends and family appear to be fine if not traumatised, however there are those that are not so lucky and our thoughts should be with them have to cope with such massive destruction and personal tragedy in an cruelly abrupt and unexpected shock to the system. Love," says Arfa Bear. What's your background, and where did you grow up? Just a general kiwi kid, grew up in the country around North Canterbury and lately North Otago. What kind of job do you do at the moment? I'm currently working in retail at Smiths City but I want to get to uni (potentially marketing/advertising). When did you come out as gay, and what was it like for you at the time? Still in the middle of coming out really, letting people find out in their own way and will tell anyone that asks (no one really asks me though), it's interesting cos I'm really a rather private guy and I dont think sexuality should matter but it does to some people so its still a bit of a grey area at the moment, I'm actually really enjoying the experience and on a more intelectual side like to see the processes people go through and how it effects different personalities and upbringings. What's your relationship status? Single, very very single unfortunately What do you think are the most pressing issues currently facing the NZ's gay community? I know im meant to say HIV, and mental health problems related to the issues that being gay in todays world brings, but to be honest I kinda want to say (and this is as a young person) the amount of pressure for people my age and younger to fit into stereotypes and be what society expects (just say f*** 'em and be true to who you want to be). What's your worst habit? I bite my fingernails (urgh) Are there any books are you currently reading or recommending? Would reccommend 'We need to talk about Kevin' by Lionel Shriver; bit of a hard (emotionally heart-wrenching) book to read but if you want something that will eventually reward you even if to show you can be persistant with a challenge then thats the one!! Really loving my design mags at the moment (mainly Urbis) giving me ideas and making me think of possibilities should I win Lotto :) Your favourite music at the moment? I'm a song oriented listener so im raving to Deadmau5 and Callvin Harris, chilling to the alt mix cd called 'The Sound and the Furry' and cruising to my classic rock, 80s synth and my beloved Phil Collins and Sade. Your favourite movies? Stranger then Fiction is and all time favourite along with the usual Shawshank, Forrest Gump, The Truman Show. Im a sucker for Rocky Horror and English gangster movies (where all the greatest quotes come from). Your favourite TV programmes? Big Bang Theory, Nitro Circus and Archer (guilty pleasure; Jersey Shore; who doesnt love them/ and or recognise a Snooki, Ron or situation in their friends!!) If you could have one wish granted what would it be? Oh no-way one wish ..... am I allowed to be selfish? A log cabin on the ski slopes of Japan, im a powder junky! And plus I could have wished for true love but thats way to cheesy and its gonna happen anyway ;) Who are your LGBT heroes? I really like people who haven't let being gay define who they are, people who are more then their sexuality; the Topp Twins, K.D. Lang, I find Neil Patrick Harris awesome too; who would have thought a gay man would be playing a notorious womanizer on a hit TV show!!! What's coming up in the near future for you? Work and more work to save for my trip to melbourne for Southern Hibearnation in June, and maybe I will try and broaden my horizons a wee bit by going back and trying out some of my old creative talents. Jacqui Stanford - 26th February 2011