11.30AM: An Auckland-based glbt telephone counseling service is noticing an increase in the number of married middle aged gay men looking for help in coming out. "While a lot of our calls relating to coming out have always been from younger people, we're noticing that a lot of gay men who got married prior to law reform are phoning us recently," says Outline general manager Neil Denney. "These are men who say they got married at a time when they felt compelled by society to do so, but twenty or more years on their children have grown up, times have changed and they now feel free to acknowledge their sexuality." Many of these men are highly stressed by facing up to issues surrounding coming out, such as how to tell their wives and children and families, also by the fact that, having been out of touch with the gay community, they are 'time warped' in their understanding of what it means to be gay in today's society. "When they married, in the early 1980s, things were very different," says Denney. "But even though New Zealand has in many respects changed regarding homosexuality, their perceptions and fears are still based on what life for lgbt people was like over twenty years ago. They don't know things have moved along" Denney says some of these men are so stressed that they are making multiple calls to Outline, formerly known as Gayline, looking for advice. Outline, which is soon to launch a national toll-free phone number, can currently be contacted on (09) 303 3584.