Mon 5 Aug 2013 In: Hall of Fame View at Wayback View at NDHA
New Zealand’s Chris Olwage is the new Mr Gay World. No stranger to New Zealand’s gay community due to his dance shows and charity work, Olwage has come a long, long way from an overweight kid in South Africa to someone who radiates positivity. Born and raised in South Africa, Olwage was heavily involved in a zealous Christian community, brought up believing that there were certain ways one had to be and conform to, “and that any deviation from the Word of the Lord in the way it was presented by our Pastor was of the devil and evil,” he has explained to GayNZ.com. It was in this context that he realised he had an attraction to the same sex before he was a teenager, then hit puberty and fully realised he was gay. “Consequently, this is when I began to derail. I became gradually reclusive, The kids at school used to make fun of me, bully me, I even tried to date a few girls but never had that effortless attraction that the other boys seemed to have for them,” Olwage recalls. “I hid away; delved into my arts and crafts, studies and any book I could find to escape the world.” Food became Olwage’s best friend and every bit of pain he felt was consequently dealt with a large helping of some sugar- or fat-laden treat “Whatever I could find I'd devour. When I look back I can see the mistakes happening, the points where I gave up and how it all spiralled out of control. Soon I was obese, depressed, lonely and now so very confused about my life, who I was and what I believed ... I was a mess.” In the very darkest hours he even tried taking his own life. “I had no one to talk to, no one to confide in, I had never felt so distant from my parents before.” On a school prefect camp he delved into the medicine box, pulled out every pill he could find and "handful by handful I swallowed them down, crying, and hoping everything would “be over soon”. The despairing teenager snuck out of the dorm and went for a walk along the beach in the pitch black night, and it was on a rocky outcrop he had a moment that was clearly a colossal turning point in his life. THE LIFE-SAVING TURNING POINT “The waves beating on the rocks seemed to soothe me, though at this point my stomach started aching. I collapsed, every pent up emotion washing over me and in the darkness I cried the most sorrowful cry I've ever had, and in the process a moment of clarity dawned upon me.” He realised he could make himself different, and be different. Maybe not straight away, but one day he could be ‘free’. It spurred him to put his fingers down his throat and force the pills he’d swallowed from his system. “I walked back to the dorm, the tears drying on my cheek, my stomach in the most horrendous pain I'd ever experienced but a calmness that I had never known,” he remembers distinctly. NEW BEGINNINGS Yes, Chris is a big softie! “The next morning I woke up with the determination to change my life. I changed the way I ate, I tried new exercises, I tried to be happy with my disposition and worked hard to accomplish the foundations that I would later build upon to be the person that I am.” Soon after, Olwage’s family moved to New Zealand and he became a North Shore boy with a fresh start. It wasn’t until his first year of university that he first summed up the courage to even explore his sexuality. He first kissed a man when he was 19. “My knees buckled like in a movie,” he laughs. “I was definitely gay!” Gay clubs and a boyfriend followed - a relationship which lasted two years. It was upon the break-up that he decided to come out to his parents: “I invited them over for a dinner at my flat, and somewhere between the main course and dessert I told them I was gay. They took it well, obviously surprised but then at the same time it explained a whole lot. “After a few months of adjustment, it was no longer an issue and was just the way it was.” NZ'S GOT TALENT By the age of 26 Olwage had shaped enough fitness, skill and self-belief to thrust himself into the harsh spotlight of talent-search TV. He left at least one judge almost speechless when he performed a sexy gender-exploding take on the Black Swan, which was more than enough to get him past the first round of the talent show. In his semi-final he performed his take on Stravinsky’s firebird, bending ballet gender norms once more with his pointe work. Olwage has been training in dance for the past four years, focusing on contemporary, with ballet as an auxiliary accompaniment. He says deciding to do pointe on national TV, when he'd only been able to just been to bourree en pointe (floaty and quick transition steps) was a bit of a challenge. Initially he and dance teacher Lisa Jurakovich spent 10 to 15 hours a week just trying to put together pieces of choreography that he could do en pointe without falling over. Olwage did not make the finals, with two singers progressing on popular vote instead, yet he learned from the NZGT experience that there are a lot of people out there who believe in him and wish to see him succeed. He says it’s strange when people tell him he is “lucky” to have the body he has built. “This ain’t luck hun, this is time and effort!” is his response. “I feel that my body has only really just started to take on the shape that I've always desired. Who knew that healthy eating and exercise was the answer!” His nights out have become less frequent and his journey has given him new found strength and increased self-efficacy: “I did it... I changed, I am no longer that angry, fat and confused kid!” is how he feels. Olwage is a group fitness instructor and dance teacher, who has recently qualified as a personal trainer – even auctioning of a few sessions for hundreds of dollars at the Gay Auckland Business Association charity auction. “I can say my work keeps me relatively fit,” he says. “It's part of my life and if I miss a workout I feel a little guilty.” His work also gives him a chance to share what he has learned, and give people the boost in confidence he fought so hard to find, whether it’s through performance or physique. For young dancers, his message is to never give up: “If you're young and you have a passion I'm jealous that you realised so young. And with all the effort and dedication you can muster you will be leagues above anything that I could ever achieve. “Just do it, and in your dark moments, remember why you do what you do!” MR GAY NZ Olwage was overwhelmed at taking out the title, telling us at the time: “I feel truly blessed and humbled, but to sum up one particular feeling or word to describe it is to fall short of the entirety of what it is I feel.” The competition and bond was tight between the three impressive and community-minded men who entered Mr Gay New Zealand this year, and the two runners-up even pledged to help and support the winner in projects he is planning. He wanted to be known as someone who is able to commit to a cause and approach it from an intelligent and informed position. “Winning this competition means that I have achieved another milestone in my life as a self-aware member of the LGBT community and, furthermore, now I have a platform as a gay, goodwill and human rights ambassador to potentially affect the lives of others who live in the darkness of self-denial, self-hate, hatred from others and fear,” Olwage explained. “I hope to achieve greater awareness of the issues that surround our community, aid the support of emerging queer youth in schools, maybe finding a possible permanent sponsor for the Mr Gay NZ title for future ambassadors and to hopefully work closer with the NZAF with the good works that they do. Chris showing his flexibility in Antwerp Olwage had to fundraise heavily to make it to Mr Gay World, and would not have been able to compete if not for gay-owned company Wireless Nation and a number of donors who don’t wish to be named. Now he is Mr Gay World, watch this space! GayNZ.com staff - 5th August 2013