If you managed to get tickets to see Urzila Carlson in Auckland this week, just a warning, she may abruptly leave. But don’t take it personally, something special’s just about to happen in her life. Our comedy favourite appeared on stage at The Loft at Q Theatre looking uncharacteristically frazzled last night, and quickly explained she hadn’t slept for two nights. That’s because her partner Julie is due to give birth to their first baby, an announcement that brought a huge cheer from the packed audience. The mum-to-be had her cellphone on a stool throughout her New Zealand International Comedy Festival performance, checking it at intervals to see if there was any news. And yet after two nights without sleep Carlson was on fire, firing one hot zinger after another and taking the audience on ride after ride of high-pitched hilarity. Her one misstep of calling a drug-sniffing dog a ‘dog sniffing dog’ just yielded fresh jokes about dogs sniffing asses. She’s quick, this one. One of the most enjoyable things about an Urzila Carlson comedy show is how much she laughs at herself, actually enjoying her own jokes as much as the audience. In The Long Flight to Freedom she tells incredible tales about her life in South Africa, from lions in the carport to being forced to strip down to her undies at work. Our favourite moments were when she compared the stories South African media have to cover, to New Zealand and its marmite crisis. She also touched on her impending motherhood - her views on punishment and how she will get around smacking laws - and marriage equality, which she jokes she was against. “It was the last thing saving me from getting married!” On that note, we made it through the show without any text messages or calls announcing she better get her ass to the hospital. Carlson said it would have been special and she would have remembered us forever if it had been the night her baby was born, but as it wasn’t, she’d forget us straight away. If she had received the call, she was out of there, and someone else was going to have to finish off her show. “It’s not hard, you just have to be an angry South African lesbian,” she boomed. And with that she was off the stage and back to the hospital. We’re pretty sure that baby will come out of the womb giggling. Tickets to Urzila Carlson’s Auckland Comedy Festival run are sold out, but keep an eye on her website for future dates. Jacqui Stanford - 8th May 2013