The former Dean of Auckland's Holy Trinity Cathedral Bishop Richard Randerson joins the voices from religion in favour of marriage equality. He has expanded upon his submission in a sermon, which we share here: Bishop Richard Randerson Same-sex relationships and gay marriage are issues that have divided the Anglican Communion painfully and harmfully for over a decade. The situation has intensified with the debate about gay marriage in Parliament, as well as in Christian communities. This morning I want to share with you why I feel a gay marriage can be consistent with Christian principles. At the same time I want to emphasise that this is my personal view, held with respect for those who hold a different view. I believe God is leading us all in a new journey of discovery, and strident claims of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ are not appropriate to the debate. Such claims are also very damaging to gay and lesbian people who have suffered centuries of rejection, with painful consequences. It was only in 1986 that homosexual relationships between men were decriminalized in New Zealand, and not until 1993 that the passing of the Human Rights Act made discrimination against homosexuals illegal. Some churches have condemned homosexuality as sinful, with messages such as “hate the sin but love the sinner”. Some such churches have offered programmes for gay people to “cure” them of their “sin”. Other churches have kept silence lest they upset parishioners. Often I have found that the parents of gay and lesbian offspring have suffered by association in the face of church silence or condemnation. Thinking about marriage and sexual relationships, I vividly recall a general studies session with the senior class at Canberra (Anglican) Girls Grammar School. About 120 young women gathered in the school’s auditorium for an “Ask the Bishop” session. Written questions were submitted in advance, and 75% were about sex. I said in response that there is a broad spectrum of types of sexual relationships, everything from promiscuous and abusive relationships at one end of the spectrum to a sexual relationship at the other that arose from a deep love and ongoing commitment to another person. And that what mattered was not so much where we might currently be on the spectrum, but what we aspired to, viz. a committed relationship grounded in love. Now if you add that marriage is about providing a stable environment in which children might be nurtured, then you have the two key principles of marriage set out in the NZ Prayer Book: first, that marriage is a gift of God so that “husband and wife should be united in heart, body and soul…and in their union fulfil their love for one another”. And second, “marriage is given to provide the stability necessary for family life, so that children might be cared for lovingly and grow to full maturity.” The definition says clearly “husband and wife”. But the Anglican definition of marriage has changed over the years. In the 1662 Prayer Book, for example, there were very different reasons stated for marriage. The first was for the procreation of children. The second was as a “remedy against sin, and to avoid fornication”. And third, it was “for the mutual society, help and comfort that one ought to have for the other, both in prosperity and adversity”. Additionally, the woman promised that she would not only obey her husband, but also serve him. So the relationship was not one of equality, and the union of husband and wife was the last of the three purposes, whereas today we regard it as the foundation of everything else. If the Church’s understanding of marriage has changed along the way, can we now modify it again to be inclusive of gay and lesbian couples? Can same-sex couples be “united in heart, body and soul…and in their union fulfil their love for each other”? Can same-sex couples “provide the stability necessary for family life, so that children might be cared for lovingly and grow to full maturity”? The answer to both questions is Yes, based on the evidence of the number of same-sex couples in long-term committed relationships, and on the basis of research that shows children may be cared for equally well in same-sex families as in hetero-sexual ones. It has taken me some years to come to this position, and I have done so on the basis of my personal friendship with gay couples in committed relationships. The Rev’d Glynn Cardy (St Matthew’s in the City, Auckland) has said: “In our time and place, given what we know about homosexuality not being an aberration, given that many gay and lesbian people are and have long been faithful members of our church, given that many gay and lesbian couples have shown in their lives the fruits of grace, aroha (love), and service, and given that some gay and lesbian couples are now asking for marriage, let us re-consider what we – in the light of God’s Spirit – think is the essence of this marriage rite”. A very important part of the debate centres around what the Bible says. Many opponents of same-sex relationships believe they are clearly prohibited by scripture. There are several problems with this view: Only a handful of biblical texts are quoted with regard to same-sex relationships, and in some it is not at all clear such relationships are the subject of the texts quoted. While same-sex relationships appear to be condemned in passages such as Romans 1.26,27, the context is one of debauched behaviours that belong to people who “refuse to keep in mind the true knowledge about God” (v.28)… “who have no conscience, and show no kindness or pity for others” (v.31). Faithlessness, lack of kindness and debauchery are not the marks of many gay and lesbian couples. Nowhere in scripture is the concept of loving, committed same-sex relationships envisaged. One cannot find a biblical text on this subject any more than one can find something about nuclear bombs or genetic modification. Reference must be made to deeper biblical principles. Even if a text could be found, scripture always needs to be interpreted in the light of current knowledge. Thus St Paul’s very clear statements that men have authority over women are a reflection of the patriarchal culture of the day. It is a concept seen as inappropriate in today’s context where the biblical principle about equality in Christ is seen as the deeper truth. Part of our current knowledge about sexual orientation is that homosexuality is not a sin or aberration, but is as natural for many in our society as hetero-sexuality is for others. Study of the contemporary biological, genetic, psychological and socio-cultural factors in sexual orientation (as called for in resolution 64 of the Lambeth Conference 1988) is an essential element in biblical interpretation. If we look to scripture for deeper principles that underlie all relationships, they include love for God and neighbour, and the belief that in such love we come to maturity in Christ, and care for the well-being of others. Within these bonds there is the special relationship that can exist between a man and a woman, a relationship that can be paralleled in a same-sex context. Archbishop Rowan Williams, researching Christianity and sexuality at Oxford University in the 1980s, concluded that biblical teaching on sexual relationships puts as much emphasis on bonding, with its essential ingredients of love and fidelity, as it does on human reproduction. There are many gay and lesbian people in the Church around the world, including clergy and bishops. They are people of integrity in living and conviction in believing. Archbishop Williams’ emphasis on bonding as a central criterion supports the view that faithful and committed same-sex relationships are also acceptable in the eyes of God. The ethical criterion is to do with the quality of the relationship, not the orientation of the partners. A final question: why have same-sex marriage? Aren’t civil unions effectively the same? To quote Glynn Cardy again: “For Anglicans marriage is a holy sacrament. Marriage has the potential to acknowledge and strengthen stable, committed relationships. Good marriages benefit the community and for many express values of long-term loving mutuality and faithfulness. I hope that we will have the grace to recognize that some couples of the same gender also exhibit these qualities and want to partake of this sacrament. To continue to deny them is to weaken the integrity of the sacrament itself”. The world is in constant change, and we change with it. Change is seldom easy, but if we allow our thinking to be guided by the grace of God, and with love and respect for one another, then I believe God will lead us to an understanding that may well lie beyond where any of us have yet got to, one that will be life-giving and inclusive of all. Bishop Richard Randerson - 18th November 2012
Credit: Bishop Richard Randerson
First published: Sunday, 18th November 2012 - 11:00am