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How would you describe your identity? Um, gender queer. Probably like probably the overall way to describe it. What does that mean to you? Um, I try as much like as much as I can. I don't really identify with gender. Like I go with how I feel about it. Um, I, I don't personally feel like I fit in any particular category, and [00:00:30] that's just a sort of thing. Do you think the language that we've used about, uh, identities has changed much over time? It has, but it hasn't like it's got better, I think. Do you find it hard to kind of describing that you identify as gender queer to people? Is it It's really difficult, like it takes me quite a while to actually trust someone enough to then explain that to them because, like in the workplace, I it's too much like it's [00:01:00] too difficult to explain that I work in a bar so it doesn't work out well to explain that to people because you constantly get flow of new people, come in and just take a lot of time to explain that, um, and like with the staff as well, it's they slip up and forget quite a lot. The ones I have explained it to. So it's just a bit like just leave it. I know myself, and, like my good friends, my close ones, they all know [00:01:30] and use it correctly, So that's good. How did you, um, when did you first realise that you were identical Queen? Um, probably like, if I look back on it, I stopped identifying with any gender specifically when I was, like, maybe 13. But, like, I only sort of found out what it was when [00:02:00] I was about 15. So, yeah, how did you learn about it? Um actually, I learned a bit in the UK, but I learned a lot more when I came to New Zealand, which was really good. But what I did learn in the UK did help me. So that was good. How did you this kind of like where did you find that information? Um, so in the UK, I found it through going to pride festivals and stuff from quite a young age was where I first sort of accessed it, but, like it accessed [00:02:30] it for personal interest. When I was sort of a bit older and also the queer groups over there. And then when I came to New Zealand, it was through one of my friends at high school. So tell me about everything over here and inform me of all the groups and things. That was good. Um, did you before you learned that gender queer was like a thing you could be, Um, did you come out as anything else first, um, I came [00:03:00] out as Trans for a wee while, um, because I thought that's what I was. Um, and I came out as outright gay for a very long time, because that's how, like, that's what I thought it was, because that was what I knew about at the time. Um, but then I realised that wasn't actually what it was. And the process of finding that out was quite good for me because it made a better balance for me. So, yeah, it was good. And through any of your coming out, what kind of reactions [00:03:30] did you get from people my parents were really accepting, which was good. Um, I had some quite nasty comments from various different people. Um, but yeah, most of my friends were accepting which was good. The ones that weren't were not really friends anymore. So yeah. What was it like at high school? Did we get out? Um, majority of my close friends in high school knew my peers around me. I wasn't out to them. Just wasn't a thing [00:04:00] that happened. Like if you came out publicly in high school in the UK. Where I was, you weren't gonna have a fun time sort of thing. Um, it just wasn't worth the harassment from everyone else to just do that. So it was just within my close circles that I did. Whereas I came out a bit bigger in New Zealand, and it was quite open, and people knew. So it was good to be here to be able to do that. Did you experience any kind of homophobia or transphobia? Yeah. Heaps and heaps, Um, [00:04:30] like, quite a bit, really. From the people that weren't as accepting, um, just like people yelling across the playground like, really offensive slurs and stuff. And it's just it's not nice to experience at all, but, um, I don't really know how to explain that your school do anything. Not particularly, um, [00:05:00] Over here. they get, um, they For a while in one of my classrooms, they had a swear box. And if he said the word gay, he had to put a dollar in a box, which was really good. And that stopped everyone in the class saying it, which was handy. Um, but it's yeah. So I have to say, and with being gender queer, do you find that it's something you have to? But I guess if I'm just, like, where do you know? Is [00:05:30] it something you have to keep on like coming out and yeah, constantly, Um, like, it's one of those things that every new person that you trust enough to tell you just have to go through the whole explaining process again. Um, a good thing on Facebook now is that you can have gender queer as your gender, which is really cool, like their gender option now is good. So that's quite cool that they actually have that now, and it makes it a lot easier if people actually [00:06:00] access my Facebook first to find out who I am. See that first? That's good. And what kind of things do people who might not like agree with it. Or, like, understand it kind of say to you, people try to challenge it and, like, yeah, they challenge it. What does that mean? But that's not in the Bible. I get from a lot of Christian people. I'm like, OK, cool. Um, sort of. I get things [00:06:30] like counting up. What? Um what, like, how does that impact me? Um, how does that make a difference to you? Like, why is there any difference from calling you him or her sort of thing? Um, yeah, like just pretty much that those sort of questions. And like the offensive things are just horrible, though, like, it's just things you don't want to think about sort of things. It's just nasty and just [00:07:00] not nice. Um, do you remember learning anything about, um, sexuality or did in your health classes at school from year seven to year 10? I did. And then after that, for year 12 and 13, I didn't do health, so I didn't learn anything then, But from year 7 to 10, I did, and I did a tiny, tiny bit in year five and six as well. What kind of stuff did they teach you? um in year five and six. They just taught you the like. Real basics of [00:07:30] people can be transgender, people can be gay and people can be straight. That was the basics that's in UK. But like, they just teach you the mainstream basics because till you get sort of two years, seven when you're a bit more understanding and then they sort of break it down a wee bit more. But it's still quite basic, really, Till you go to art and do your own research. Um, is it important to you to kind of have a sense of, like, community and belonging? Definitely. [00:08:00] Yeah, I think it's good to have a community of people here that are sort of going through similar experiences. Not the same, but similar. So you sort of have that backup of support if you need it there. Um, and it's also good to have someone always to talk to as well, which is nice. Have you been involved in the community or met other people? Um, so, through utopia, I've met a few people in for as well, which are the groups in Christchurch and also [00:08:30] through going to the in Wellington, which have been fun. So I think I met more people through the in Wellington than I have in Christchurch. Can you tell me a bit About what the, um um they're really awesome. Educational weekends run by QSA A from people all over New Zealand, like youth and things to go, Um, stay on the marae for a few days and learn about lots of different things and meet awesome [00:09:00] new people. So much fun. Really enjoy it. And have you, like, kept in contact with all those people. You? Me? Yeah. Yeah. And do you see kind of things like Facebook and all sorts of social media playing more of a part in the way that we connect with other home friends? Definitely so much different. Um, I met cool people from the states using the photo blogging site, or like general blogging site Tumblr and through Facebook as well, just like the different groups [00:09:30] you can have on there of like, um, just various different people. And it's good because all the queer youth groups in New Zealand or have a Facebook page as well. So you can be part of all of those as well and connect with all those sort of people, too, which is good. Have you found any other, um, people who identify iQue? Um, I found a few. Not too many. Um, there's a few, Like, I think I [00:10:00] know one other person in Christchurch and everyone else is elsewhere. But yeah, um, what do you think about the way queer and Trans people are represented in the media? It's It's all right. It's not bad, Like representations at the moment with the, um, marriage bill passing, um, things have become a lot more positive, I found, but I still find if something goes wrong and it's a queer or trans person, it's completely blown [00:10:30] up when it shouldn't be at all. It shouldn't be like that, but it happens and sort of how it goes in the media. And it's silly, really. It shouldn't be like that. It should be treated like everyone else should be treated equally in the media. Really, What do you think about the magical Bill Patton? I think it's good. I think it's probably one of the best moves. It's happened in a long time. Um, I like the whole argument just before it was passed of you wouldn't do this if Pacifica Maori people [00:11:00] were trying to marry, um or like Hispanic people trying to marry. This wouldn't be happening. So why is this happening to them? It's not fair. And it's really good. So, yeah. Did you, um, write a submission or celebrate? Yeah, it happened. Yeah. Um, my mom threw a, um, rainbow party at her work and got me to make rainbow cupcakes. Is it, um, what about like, have you seen any storylines or characters [00:11:30] you can relate to in kind of like books, movies? TV shows? Not particularly, But in Skins, the TV show from the UK Frankie was like, as much as the shows went on, she started to identify more as female. Those first few episodes. She was like, just the way she dressed the way she acted. And everything was really quite gender queer sort of thing. So that was quite a good sort of identification for those starting block episodes. [00:12:00] Why do you think about the way they kind of handled that and went on with it? I think she was who she wanted to be and then changed to fit in, which wasn't too good. But Yeah. Didn't that reflects a lot of people's experience? Maybe a gender? Yeah, definitely changed. Fit in. Um, some people are right and outlandish about who they are, which is really nice, and it's good that they can [00:12:30] do that. But so many people don't have the confidence to be like that. It's all about confidence. A lot of the time and the support from people around. Do you see, um, many like stereotypes of Queen Trans people in the media? Um, yeah, quite a few. Like, sort of. One of the biggest ones I've noticed is with gay people [00:13:00] in general. They just hook up with everyone. It's one of the biggest things like on TV shows. Just they hook up with every single person, and it's not actually how it is half the time, like get the odd one here and there. But majority of people aren't like that. So yeah, it's one of them. And also with another one for, like gay people, is lesbians dressing all butch and gay guys dressing all like them. So, [00:13:30] yeah, that's not what it's like, either. Have you had any, um, role models? Um, a few. A few, um, sort of a lot to do with the industry that my mom worked in. She's a hairdresser. It's quite a big industry for, like, queer and trans people. And I've met a lot of them through her, which was cool. Um, [00:14:00] and there's some really cool people in New Zealand as well that I sort of admire for the way they are, which is cool. Um, do you know of any, like, famous people? I don't actually like. I've tried to find people that are out there, I guess. Um, not really, No. Do you think if it was, like, more widely, um, accepted to be in the that there [00:14:30] would be? Yes, definitely. Definitely. What do you think are some of the most important issues that are facing current trans young people in New Zealand at the moment? Um, acceptance of trans people in general? Um, the knowledge of being gender queer like isn't very vast. Um, having actually like awareness and people respecting them. I think a lot more respect is needed for [00:15:00] people that they think because there's something that they're gonna want to do something. And it's not the case half the time, and I think it needs to be sort of taught people a lot younger over here as well. Be good. What do you think some of the solutions might be? Some of the solutions is wider knowledge. That is a big solution. Um, there's no way to make people more accepting, really other than to inform them and give them knowledge. [00:15:30] And that's sort of the best way to do it. Really, If you could explain to people, um, why it's so important that they see you as gender queer and use the right pronouns and things like that. What would you say? Um, I would just sort of start with explaining to them how would so, like, say they were identifying as female. How would they like it if people just continuously kept calling them him or he I was just like, [00:16:00] Oh, you're such a nice boy sort of thing. How, like dysphoric, they'd feel within themselves and sort of explain that it's just like it affects your feelings a lot and like it makes you feel really dysphoric and sort of hurt almost. And it's good to have that sort of explanation there and just explain to people like how they feel that tends to explain it to you. Do you think it's hard of being, um, being a trans person in the South Island? [00:16:30] I think so. There's more knowledge on the North Island and the South Island. South Island is quite reserved. Really, I'd say, Um, Nelson's pretty good. Like Nelson's pretty out there. Christchurch is all right within the right circles sort of thing. What do you know about, um, history of Queer Rights in New Zealand Or internationally? Internationally? I know quite a bit, um, [00:17:00] half milk and things like that from, um, stuff from the states, Um, with New Zealand. My where I went to high school, they had the first openly lesbian principle, and I think it was either in New Zealand or in the South Island. Um, one of the first queer groups was set up in New Zealand in Nelson, Um, [00:17:30] the obviously the marriage equality bill Passing? Yeah, just like quite a bit. Um, good background knowledge to get me places sort of thing. Where do you think we might be in 10 years time? Hopefully more informed, hopefully more accepting. So I think Yeah, and hopefully it's just gonna be a happier place and because people will actually understand [00:18:00] what's it like? Um, for you, um, transitioning from school into university. Um, it's good, actually, I live in the house, so I just moved in a week ago. Um, most floors, they have either female or male bathrooms. Luckily, on my floor, they have a female male bathroom together, which is, like, nice. So I don't have to choose. It is like the other side, but that's cool. It's still on my floor, which is good and in my building, [00:18:30] so I don't have to run across buildings for showers, which is good. Um, and yeah, it uni is a lot of fun compared to high school high school. You find you're in a condensed place with lots of people that know everyone and anyone, whereas at uni there's so many people there you don't like. It's not the same harassment. There are people more grown up. It's good. It's fun. Have you experienced any homophobic or trans phobia? Not particularly. No. Um, like [00:19:00] my workplace is at the university, and they're all really accepting of things. Um and yeah, it's just not bad there, So it's good. Have you connected with, um, uni or any of the queer support stuff they have there. Um, I haven't as of yet because I've been really busy, um, doing my assignments and everything, so I haven't actually had time yet, but hopefully over my next period of down time, I am gonna have some time. I am signed [00:19:30] up to uniq. So it's a start. What are your hopes for your future? Um, I'm doing engineering and science at the moment to become a a engineer geologist. So see where it takes me. Um, if you could give a message to young people struggling with, um the kind of gender identity, Um, in high school, [00:20:00] what would you say? Don't give up on what people say to you. It it's People are gonna be nasty. You just sort of have to look at it as they're misinformed, trying to educate them. Feel sorry for them, then they don't know. You're like, you're fine. It's them. You just need to know that they just don't have the right like the right knowledge that they need. And what's your favourite thing about being a young person in New Zealand? [00:20:30] Just everything there is here. Um It's not an issue like it would be. The amount of attack on Queer Trans and gender queer and stuff in New Zealand is so minimal compared to the UK. It's so much safer to be out here. It's good.
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