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I like saying queer more than I like saying anything else, but I don't like using it in reference to my sexuality or anything. I guess in the queer scene, I would kind of call myself queer. But in the in the in, just the day to day life, I'd call myself a lesbian because I feel like it's easier. And it's more relevant to like what I'm doing now. And it saves like questions or like having to explain yourself or kind of justify yourself when sometimes [00:00:30] you just can't be bothered. And what does queer mean to you? Just, um, like whatever I want at the time, like it means that I can just It means that I can just do whatever I want and I don't feel like boxed in like it means that like, yeah, it means that I can just like whoever I want And I don't feel boxed up, Yeah, and why don't you crystal like to put kind of labels on you Not to be like, I suppose, disrespectful to people that it really is [00:01:00] a huge part of my identity, But I feel like it's not a part of my identity that I need to express verbally, if that makes sense, like I don't know. Also, I think for me, I guess I kind of don't really say I'm a lesbian. I say, I'm Harriet. And then I just mentioned that I have a female partner. But I guess people in the straight community usually mean that they just assume that means I'm a lesbian because [00:01:30] because I'm with crystal or whatever. And then if I say Oh, blah, blah, blah my ex-boyfriend's like what? You had a boyfriend. What I'm like, Yeah, Sometimes they can have it like, just calm down, everyone. When did you become aware about your 6 11? No, Um, I suppose strictly when I was 21. But I don't I never know whether to like, I suppose, before that [00:02:00] I kind of thought I was asexuals or something for a long time and then clue in a bit later. But I don't know if that's part of this or not part of it. Whatever you want is part of it. Fine, then, like 16. Maybe. What kind of made you aware of that? Do you know? Like, were there things that you were thinking about? I don't know. I was reading a lot about Stephen Fry at that [00:02:30] time, and I became a little bit obsessed with him. And I just thought he was so great. And I was like, That is so cool that he can be, you know, this gay man in his sixties or something, but be celibate with his partner and and not have that I don't know, kind of. I don't even know what. But just I thought it was such a cool idea that that you could acknowledge how you feel [00:03:00] about things but not have to. I don't know. I just think Stephen Fry is really cool and I want that on record. And can you tell us who Stephen Fry is? In case people don't know? Um, he's this really cool British dude who he's a bit queer and and he's in like, some cool movies. And he hosts a show called Q I, which is like my favourite TV show. And he's just like a genius. Pretty much it's just like a really [00:03:30] smart cool all around. Dude, what did you say he was a comedian? He is a bit of a comedian, too. So do you say he was like an important kind of role model. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he was Yeah. I don't know. I just think he's great. Did you have to kind of come out? Do you think people still have to do that? Did you? What was your I told? I told my mum straight [00:04:00] up that Mum, I'm gay, and she's like, Ok, and then I don't I feel I feel like like I told her and and quite explicitly and stuff, but she maybe didn't understand all the sort of direct connotations of that or anything. But I also didn't feel like I had to elaborate on what, if anything, would change because I was gay. So sometimes she says things that are a bit [00:04:30] OK, ma. So, like, I came out to her and she told my dad and like my sister's No, but I haven't I don't know. I just don't really feel compelled to tell people straight up and generally, like, if if they're important to me and they're in my life, they already know Harry. Anyway, So it's all done for me. How about you, Harriet? When did you become aware of? Um [00:05:00] I guess I guess I kind of I guess I like in school. I feel like I did know that I had crushes on girls, but I didn't really think it was like a big deal or something that was like anything I thought it was just like something that happened. But I feel like I guess I didn't realise there were crashes at the time. But now I kind of look back and I think, Oh, yeah, they totally were then because because I read this book that said [00:05:30] Everyone has a crush on a girl doesn't mean you're a lesbian. And I was like, OK, great. But I actually I feel kind of annoyed at that book because it should say everyone has a crush on a girl doesn't mean you're a lesbian, but some people are. I feel like that would have been like a handy extra sentence because I feel like it was, like, kind of confusing. And, um, what was the other question about coming out? And, um, I guess I, I guess I was like kind of like thinking about stuff in my head, and I kind of [00:06:00] I kind of because I was dating me and I kind of felt like it was a kind of like a cliche or like I was trying to be someone that I wasn't to come out or say I was queer or say I was attracted to women. So I kind of just didn't until I had a girlfriend. And then it was, like, pretty obvious to Deborah because I had a girlfriend. So then they just like, figured it out. But I do feel, um, like like now I feel like I like I mean, I don't like that I have to, but I do like [00:06:30] coming out to people just say, just like correcting people. You know, people say, Oh, I say, Oh, my partner blah, blah, blah. And they say, What does he do? And I say She and I feel kind of like, annoyed that they that they would like, make those assumptions. And I feel like I want to out myself so that more people will realise that they shouldn't make assumptions about like, heteronormative assumptions about people. So both of you kind of came out after high school or were kind of figuring stuff out more then, but what do you think do you think your high school experiences [00:07:00] kind of played a part at all? Or do you think maybe if things have been different, you would have come out earlier? Or I feel like the first girl I went to, my first high school was extremely conservative, and I know that another girl in my class, I don't know if she came out, but she made out with some other girls in the locker room and everyone was like It was like a pretty negative reaction, [00:07:30] like everyone said like, pretty horrible things and I kind of I didn't think it was horrible, But I guess I kind of kind of joined in like I was kind of like, Oh, like, Oh, why would you do that? Oh, OK, but I feel kind of like bad about it now, But at the time, I just kind of thought like I don't know Why would you kiss someone at school? It just seemed like a weird thing to do to me. But then in my then I changed high school and it was like I met some queer people like [00:08:00] queer teenagers, and I thought it was pretty cool, and I just was like, fine with it, But I kind of had a boyfriend. So I was like, OK, great, whatever. Just anything then. Oh, this is hard. But, um, what was the question again? Do you think your kind of high school experiences kind of have, um, affected this? Especially because you didn't come out until you were, um, older. Do you think if things had been different or what was your high school environment kind of like, [00:08:30] Um oh, I feel like I didn't even know anything about or anything that wasn't like a really negative kind of media stereotypical portrayal of gay or queer at the time. Like, I don't know, [00:09:00] they I I just because I like I remember the year after I left school there was like, this big thing. And when I came back for the summer, all these kids were like, Oh, did you hear? So and so and all these kids came out and stuff when they left here, blah, blah, blah. And now they're at uni and all this stuff. And I remember thinking, Oh, OK, cool. But like I think possibly it it wasn't an environment that people could come out and at the time, But then the [00:09:30] wags started the year after I left. I think that's what it is at swags. I don't know, an acronym for something? Well, no. Wellington's alliance of gays and straights. Yeah. And, yeah, it started when I left. I don't know, but, um, I don't I just I feel like now I'm a little [00:10:00] bit angry at just the educational system in terms of like like, you know, you do health study at school or something, and they don't acknowledge anything along those lines. I feel like if maybe I'd, I don't know, head knowledge of it or or if someone had explained it in a really, I don't know, just applicable way it would have worked. Do you remember anything kind of in the health curriculum either [00:10:30] of you about sexual orientation or gender identity? I remember learning lots of stuff about straight sex, but I don't remember learning anything about sexuality at all. I don't even remember it being mentioned at all. Actually, no, I don't think so, But But I do know that now. My school I was surprised that school's out, [00:11:00] who are, uh, Wellington based youth School age support network Go, um, do a talk at my old high school, which is really good and also was, um, surprising for me, But going back to the old question, I think if I had been at my second high school the whole time, I might have come out earlier or kind of realised or kind of been in a different space [00:11:30] than in my super conservative, private all girls high school because there just wasn't a, um, supportive environment. Also, I'd heard that some girls had been because it used to be a boarding house and some girls had been expelled for for, like, a long time ago. But I'd still heard it expelled for lesbian activity like one girl gave the other girl a massage or something and then got expelled from the school. So I was kinda like, Well, OK, it must be like a really, like a not like, [00:12:00] I don't know, not good. Must be not a good thing to do. I didn't want to get expelled. I didn't really Not that I really wanted to give anyone else a massage, but I don't know, maybe if I had, I probably would have not done it because it would have been a bit scary. And do you remember anything in health classes? Not beyond the weird kid putting a condom on his head, so yeah. No, there was There was nothing. I don't know. Um, So what do you guys think are the most kind of important issues [00:12:30] that are facing queer and trends young people in New Zealand today, I think lack of information and lack of support from people. I mean, like, say, your straight parents might teach you the things that they know, but maybe they don't know that much either. So it's kind of I mean, who's if the school, if your school isn't? Yeah, just the lack of information and support. Yeah, I. I agree with that. Like, I agree differently with the lack of information [00:13:00] because I feel like if it was just you know, if it was just kind of a segment in your health class, you you would not be the tool bag in the playground who uses fag to describe their friends. Like in Yeah, Gay is not an acronym for Shitty. And it's a fall out boy song. So it's applicable to young kids. Do you guys hear that a lot still or did you [00:13:30] while you were at school, people using that again to me Fucking stupid or And even I said it. And I feel like I kind of like at 17. I was kind of like, Hold on, that's not OK. And I kind of had to train myself out of saying it because it was just something that was said and I didn't even think about it at all. Like I didn't really I didn't really think about it. And normally now I don't really hear it, But occasionally I do hear it when I'm kind of in a different place, like not in my work or not with my normal friends. And I feel [00:14:00] really shocked and kind of crossed, and I try to pull people up on it. But some people, sometimes people just are still quite oblivious, and they don't really. They they seem like, kind of taken aback or just kind of surprised or kind of confused about what I've kind of just said to them. But I do kind of make a point of trying to pull people up or just kind of being like I'm just kind of leaving the conversation or just being kind of annoyed that that people would still, you know, say something so silly. I. I do remember kids saying [00:14:30] it at school. I don't know if I ever picked it up as a thing, because I feel like I remember trying to use it once and then feeling so guilty about it, and then I never use it again. But I used to be like no one of those like, No, I'm not going to swear because I like having a vocabulary and and stuff like that. So maybe it was just tighter with that, Um, I don't know, but I feel like it was it was definitely a lot more of a deal with, like my sister's [00:15:00] year, who was below me because she's still like It's just ingrained in in the way she talks about anything. Nowadays. She just drops it all the time. And, um, what do you guys think? Issues facing current twenties in New Zealand will be in, like 10, 20 or 50 years time like didn't they will be. It will be the same kind of thing, or do you think we will have kind of evolved quite a lot. I feel like, um ideally [00:15:30] that we will have evolved a lot and I think that will be good. And I feel like even though it's kind of like a small step and there's still lots to do in the community, I think, um, the marriage, equality, passing in New Zealand kind of helped get some kind of visibility of the queer community and kind of like acceptance and kind of like a mainstream way that everyone can kind of see. And it was like a big deal. And it was really loud, like in Parliament and, you know, lots of people talking [00:16:00] about it, and lots of people had opinions about it. So I feel like it's kind of like a small stepping stone that could kind of lead to other things. All I can think of is like like in in 10, 50 years or something, you're gonna be going to funerals of, like, grandparents or or something that are strange, because they don't understand this right now, and it will be a weirdly tragic but happy time. Watching them slowly die out. [00:16:30] You mean goodness, I don't really have much to say all right, I'm talking like Fred Phelps. I'm not talking about your grandma. She's already OK, baby, let's move on. Um, how does this kind of community and kind of belonging to the kind of rainbow queer community important to you guys? Not especially. No, I don't think [00:17:00] so. Oh, well, kind of. No, not really. I just feel like I. I just kind of happen to be in this community, and that's where my friends are. So that's where I am. That's how I like it. But I feel like I'll be happy to be in any community. But that said, I do kind of like to to, um, to go to, like, queer events and stuff because I feel like I feel safer, like if, like, if I'm holding hands with the crystal on the street or something, Sometimes I feel like worried that someone's going to, like, approach me or say something not very nice to me. [00:17:30] So I feel like sometimes I do like being in the queer community because, um, it can be like a safer space. But, um, I I feel like it's not. Not that, I mean, if it was if I felt safe everywhere. Then it will be It will be. I'll be fine. To not like exclusively only be part of the community. I don't know. I thought it would be the answer for the last question Now except then I kind of didn't like all of [00:18:00] the toilets, all unisex. And then so wait. Now that kind of isn't It was supposed to be What's going to be an issue? A Well, no, you said, What's it? What's it gonna look like? And and like, moms and young Children won't ask you if you're in the wrong toilet and think that you can't read. And also people will say firefighter, for goodness sake, just say firefighter and police officer officer instead of policemen [00:18:30] and firemen. And also people won't say When you're crossing the road and the little light thing lights up, you won't say Look out for the green, man. You will see. Look out for the green person. Um so are you guys part of any groups in the queer community? Or are you part of, um, kind of like sports or arts or kind of other activities outside of that community? A DJ [00:19:00] for Derby does that count as something counts as, uh, it's a little bit arty sports sports. Are they queer sports teams? And you're in the gay gay choir choir. What's the big gay quiet? It's It's not actually called that. That's just what I like to call it. Quiet, Quiet [00:19:30] with a cue for What does it mean? It's just queer People singing, singing, singing is they? They do like choose to join a queer choir over a kind of non, Not especially it just I. I don't know. It just came up on my Facebook feed. I was like, All right, [00:20:00] if someone can teach me how to sing, do we have to explain what Facebook is? And then Harry will stop telling me I suck. Oh, what What does Facebook? Um, how do you think Facebook and Tumblr and Social Media kind of plays a part in the way? But, um, yeah, and the way that we connect and build our community? Um, yeah, especially as kind of queer young people. I feel like it's a really positive platform and also really negative [00:20:30] can be negative as well, because, um, it's kind of good. It's easy to make connections and kind of see people and be connected with events and make events and have people like see the events. I'm kind of trying to think I don't even remember how you found out about stuff before Facebook. Actually, that sounds silly, but I just truly can't remember. Oh, OK, maybe. And But sometimes I feel like it can be negative because I feel like sometimes within minorities, [00:21:00] people can be quite critical or harsh of each other. And I feel like the Internet or social media kind of gives people kind of like a faceless kind of opportunity to kind of say things that they may not say in person. I think people can get really hurt by that and and even stuff like not just within the within the minority itself, but just like stuff like cyber bullying, people being mean on the Internet, saying things that they wouldn't normally say through things like social media like [00:21:30] Facebook or or Tumble like saying hurtful things to people that they they may, they may not save money in real In real life, I feel like I've only well, I suppose I only really remember strictly kind of negative things based on like it. Like Harriet said it. It just gives people a faceless kind of opportunity to, I don't know, [00:22:00] attack each other or or something in. And it I think it it make. This was something I was talking about the other day, and it's kind of not really a thing, but it makes people very prone to sort of try and out jargon each other with their acronyms or something. And then, I don't know. You just you sort of read it and get a bit blitzed with Oh, gosh, I don't know what that means. I'm not queer enough anymore or something. [00:22:30] Yeah, I feel like there's a lot of terminology in the queer community. And sometimes people are like, Oh, blah, blah, this thing, this and I'm like, I just don't know what that means. And I kind of feel like, maybe, like, guilty, like I should know. Or how can you ask about, like, how can you How do you know that? Oh, are you queer? Are you even queer? Do you even Why don't you even know that? Because I feel like once you know something, you're like I know that. Why don't you know that I feel like that can be that Facebook is a good opportunity for people to like use language that I might not know. But [00:23:00] I guess it's an opportunity to learn something else, kind of both. Sometimes a lot of it is just a bit over the top in terms of like, how many different acronyms do you have for the same thing? Because people do it different ways or something. And you're just like, OK, what do you think about the way queer and Trans people are portrayed in the media currently both kind of thinking like Maybe, you know, like local [00:23:30] like, historic like people we know in New Zealand, like maybe politicians or famous people who are kind of queer but also thinking about like TV programmes like glee or like you know, what do you guys are we in the media? I feel like there's the visibility issue, so we're not there. But when we are, sometimes it can be quite negative. Or can we can be [00:24:00] where people can be portrayed as sad and bullied and troubled quite and quite negative kind of this. I feel like I always want to watch a queer movie or like a movie about two women, like a romantic movie about two women. That's not about them being queer like That's them about like like a like a straight romantic comedy where there's like some other kind of drama which has nothing to do with, like, just something that's not about them, like [00:24:30] coming out to their family or feeling sad or like turning straight or just just a movie. That's like just about just something just nice, like It's like a nice I don't know, just a different kind of romantic comedy for lesbians. That's not about just It's not about being a lesbian. I think often Trans people are made a mockery of in the media and all portrayed as, um really, um, like, especially [00:25:00] like, um, male to female Trans people are portrayed is like, really sexual and really like yeah, just really like That's like a focus of their personality or them or their portrayal in the media kind of or just kind of or just kind of miss, just kind of mistaken, just kind of badly portrayed, kind of just [00:25:30] like they kind of had no idea what they were talking about, and It's just kind of like a big joke. And if you kind of pull people up, I feel like people like, Oh, it's just just TV or it's just, you know who cares? It's just a thing. It's like, Well, actually, I do care because it's how people you know youth will you know that's what people see. Media is really powerful, and if they see all these negative issues, negative images or negative ideas about people, that's gonna affect how they are I. I agree with that. Like when there is media portrayal, [00:26:00] it's very, Oh, it's a le being romantic comedy or or whatever the deal is in that I don't know. That's just annoying in a way, and kind of I was thinking of like glee and like I feel like there's There's always this kind of like if a if a straight actor or actress is playing a gay character [00:26:30] when they're doing interviews as themselves, they are very, very quick to point out. Oh, I'm different from this and stuff and then they try and make it like like I'm highlighting this because I think it's good for the world to see that a straight actor can play a gay character and and that there's probably definite positive aspects to that. But I also people don't go around asking Anne Hathaway, who always plays straight people saying, Well, maybe she's been playing gay and I've [00:27:00] missed it. But don't always go around asking her if she's straight playing straight all the time, like Why do you need to distance yourself from it? Especially if you're trying to garner that kind of audience as yeah, you know, platform or something, or I don't know, but that's a little bit annoying, but I don't know. And then they get famous because gay kids and and queer kids and everyone are just like [00:27:30] the best fans ever. So it becomes a big thing. But then it's still like, I don't know, they don't want to be associated. Or do you guys watch specific things in the media or read specific things because there's queer characters to kind of see that identity reflected or yes, definitely I Yeah, I definitely do. I really do glee. I think Glee is a good example, because [00:28:00] I feel like I mean, some of the things I've done are a bit crap, but Well, there's lots of queer characters and lots of relatable, maybe potentially relatable characters, and it's like a high school drama about lots of things. It's like fun musical, and it's super popular and everyone loves it. And there's lots of queer characters just chucked on in there like Heaps all the time. And I think that's pretty great, actually. Do you think things like, um, Glee have kind of changed the way that queer people are perceived or like? Do you think they've made a difference? Actually, [00:28:30] yes, I do. I can't really describe how, but I I think they, they, they they well, they they make it visible and they kind of they kind of touch on issues that teenage that youth or teenagers might have, and they kind of relatable and fun character. So So, yeah, I think so. Glee really annoys me like I like glee, and I like [00:29:00] that they are queer things, but I have big issues with it, especially in terms of lesbian portrayal, because it's like like they oh, it makes me so angry sometimes, like they take so much care with a gay male character and trying to make that like this poignant kind of life changing thing. But when it's like queer young girls, one of them is a bitch and the other is an idiot and they're supposed to kind of I. I don't know. You're supposed [00:29:30] to find some kind of, you know, nice thing and their relationship, but also not really understand it. And it's not expanded upon, and it's like no one cared to make them characters. It was just a kind of gimmick to bring in the female gay crowd or something like that. Like That's true because with Kurt, they talked about his relationship with his father and about his father's lack of knowledge of, of, of [00:30:00] gay sex and and they but then with the they didn't even they didn't even and Britney was so like, not even a character. She's just like a gimmick. She's like there to say stupid things about ducks and cats and get Santana off. That's about it. Yeah, and it sucks. It really sucks. And I mean, there's also that thing where it's like, Are we ever going to see a boyish? Or I think maybe androgynous is the wrong word. [00:30:30] But like a boyish female gay character on a show that popular or something like, I feel like Glee could totally pull it off. Glee probably could, but they won't. And if they do, it'll be bad. Maybe they would be so bad. I feel like No, I kind of hope they would. I thought I thought the real glee, the real whatever, what it called the glee. I don't know the real G, whatever, whatever that is when they get the real people [00:31:00] to audition to be on the TV show, they might have glee project the glee because they kind of like having those kind of Yeah, it's like they bring them into audition, though. But then decide halfway through. Nah, you're not quite what we're looking for there, Danny. Is it Danny? Yeah, that kid. And apparently like the actress that played What's her face? Rachel hit on her anyway or something while she was there. I know. I mean, like like they're not, you know, they they think they've sort of pandered to [00:31:30] the female population as much as they need to. And that's about it Now, I reckon, Yeah, I agree with you, but I still I agree. I totally agree with you, but I just still, I just still like it. I guess that's because it's it's all I've got. So I just I really like skins. I love Naomi. Harriet hates it. [00:32:00] I don't know. It was just, I think I think skins really well, skins. I have to explain it like a TV show. Like it's It's like a British based kind of young teen thing, all about the the real teenager. But it's a little bit, you know, kind of hyper or hyped up and and stuff and just all the sick and drugs and stuff. That doesn't really happen, but they make it look really nice anyway. But, um, [00:32:30] so I think I think what skins did really well was they They like like the portrayal of knowing Emily. It wasn't about them being gay. It was just like a really kind of cute relationship. Are you sure? Yeah, I'm pretty sure because, like, well, even if it was about them being gay or whatever they like, there were aspects that were expanded upon like you, you had to learn about Emily's really fucked up, screwed up relationship with her sister, her twin sister [00:33:00] and stuff and like her mom was a wanker. And, you know, they were. They were, And like Naomi's mum was just lovely and weird, kind of like my mum. And like, I don't know, their friends were like cool but kind of tools at the same time. And friends are generally like that. So do you think? Yeah, How do you think it's different to like the characters and [00:33:30] the way it makes you feel? A different. It's a different country. So is always more kind of like than America. America is more kind of shiny American TV shows are kind of more shiny and happy, and I don't know. I feel like in British TV shows there's kind of Yeah, it's just kind of more gritty and kind of real or maybe more like a little bit darker or something. It was dark in the end. It made me cry. Everything makes you cry. What do you think crystal [00:34:00] about? Just like British American Or like the difference between bully and skins and how you feel about the cat? Because he talked about how, I suppose, like just what I said, like, skins kind of caught them as people, not characters or or stereotypes to get an audience. And I mean, like, I never actually finished watching the end of the the third generation, but like that whole kind of Frankie as a character that was such a cool character, [00:34:30] too. And it's like she wasn't just some gimmick to bring in crowds. Even well, maybe she changed her, I don't know, but like there were, there were aspects of just like being a cool person there and not just a This is a gay character and you're gonna have to be happy with it because it's all you get kids that you to not be on that or I just felt like, [00:35:00] Oh, it's just when I met Crystal, she was just really in love with those characters and, like thought they were so great. And then I watched it, and I was kind of like they're kind of horrible to each other. They're kind of horrible to each other. And the only cute time is when they hold hands through the cat door that is actually like the ultimate scene and probably like the best thing ever. But apart from that, I feel like they're quite mean to each other. And kind of if we had to rate glee and skins against each other and it was cat flap versus Britney and Santana on a bed cat flap [00:35:30] is gonna win. Or, like, even what's that? Like Britney and Santana First kiss at a Valentine's thing? That was the worst kiss ever, by the way. Really fucking awkward looking. I mean, work for the swearing a lot, but, jeez, Kit Fleck just wins. I agree. Um, and so how about you guys kind of personally like, looking forward to you? Are you interested in things like marriage and Children? [00:36:00] Yes, we are. Yes. I feel like, um I feel like Yes, I do want to have Children. I I'm going to have Children. And I feel like, um, I feel like there there should be It will be good to, um, have more support for, um, queer people wanting to start families. So just kind of I don't I don't really know where to go to kind of find support or information or Yeah, that too. Yeah. Yeah. True. Yeah, I Yeah, I don't know about that. And also, um, [00:36:30] I feel like now there is like, I don't really believe in marriage because I don't know. It seems a bit kind of funny, but I feel like now, of course, I'm like, I think it's great that there is marriage equality. But I feel like I would get married and it could kind of help me like, um, legally like, especially in terms of like if I had If we had a child, it would help us. It would help the child [00:37:00] to for us to be married, I think I I feel like that might be a thing because I guess, like, yeah, I think it would just help it would. I think it would just give some kind of legal standing and and so that is good and stuff like adoption. Is it legal now? I think it is maybe a logo on the way. On the way. I'm I'm really [00:37:30] interested in the adoption aspect, but what do you mean? You want to adopt a child? I do. I like I want to adopt kids because I, I don't know, I apparently you you said It's like a thing that a lot of maybe like queer people in general seem to hatch upon that aspect of of procreating as a kind of like, [00:38:00] What do you call it, like narcissistic or something kind of a deal or a no? No. Like like having kids. You said You said you'd come across like a few people that had had the same kind of I do. It was me or whatever, where, where? I. I feel like like not not to call people you know, dicks for wanting to have kids or something. But But I, I feel like personally, I wouldn't want to have Children because II I [00:38:30] just feel like it's I can't think of the word. I feel like there's two. I feel like it's it would be really difficult to adopt a child. I feel like in New Zealand there are not, like tonnes and tonnes of Children to adopt and I. I find it a bit kind of maybe, I don't know, kind of strange and kind of like, kind of like, um was it like an accessory to adopt a child from a different country? I feel like there's something just not quite [00:39:00] right about, and I just from my knowledge, there's not a huge amount of Children that need adopting or get adopted out in New Zealand because lots of Children in New Zealand get adopted within, like a family, kind of because that's how that yeah, like like Maori culture. So you so you would. So it's not that common. And also, I know that you can also discriminate against, um I know that you can with sperm donation, you can discriminate against adopting [00:39:30] to a gay family. And I feel like that would be really, um, like, horrible and like, really heartbreaking if you were really wanting a child. And I guess I just selfishly really want to give birth because I want to have that experience. So I, I Yeah, I hope there's like, more support for people who who want to have babies that way for me to, like, look to for information. So, do [00:40:00] you guys want to stay in New Zealand live, grow up here, have kids adopt kids here? Where do you want to go? Somewhere where I'm not going to be poor for the rest of my life. And what, um, jobs do you guys do now? And what are the things that you want to do or what are you studying. I am an early childhood teacher and I love my job. And I would ideally like to raise Children in New Zealand because, um, it is what? [00:40:30] Sorry. Go on, I'm done now. I mean, I because I because it's where I'm from and I feel like it's a nice country, and I feel I like it here. And this is where my family is. And this is where I'm from and that, and I feel like it's an important part of me that I'd want to share with my Children. Um, I'm TN [00:41:00] a sound engineer, and I'm studying business now, but hopefully I get into New Zealand drama school next year to do the entertainment technology course and I. I want to at this point in time, because it's probably going to change. I want to shut up here. I want to run sound for, like, Broadway or musical theatre or like West End kind of a deal. [00:41:30] And there's not a lot of work going in sound engineering in New Zealand anyway, so which is why I'm poor, but if But if you like, say you want to be in a different country for like your job prospects. But do you think New Zealand is an ideal place to raise a child? I know there was like, Yeah, they are, You know, whenever I I imagined raising kids or something, [00:42:00] I imagine doing it, like at my parents' house or something, and and having weirdo fields for them to run through and be dear and boo tree houses. But like that means I'd have to learn how to drive because it's in the middle of nowhere. But like I like, I also, uh, I also I want to raise, like, have kids or raise kids overseas because I want them to be international citizens [00:42:30] and and, you know, and there's this mindset of growing up in New Zealand, we're so far from removed from everything that we just don't click into the way things are everywhere else, I reckon, And like if you could raise a kid somewhere like Europe, where you could go, how many different places in a day or something that would be wicked, and then they could have the passport and come back here when they want to and need to go swimming at Tana Beach [00:43:00] and see some sand but and and yeah, but I suppose ideally, I'd want to, like, go work on Broadway, I think, for a couple of years and then probably come back. Yeah, Yeah. I like it here a lot. Um, do you guys have any kind of final things you'd like to say? Share with the people who will be listening to this in the future? [00:43:30] Anything you think is important to say about the way things are right now, Um, I feel like there's there's some positive things happening, but I feel like we there's, like, a long way to go for queer people to feel, um completely safe and visible and recognised and accepted in the without having to make a big scene about it all [00:44:00] the time. Yeah, like like I'm kind of looking forward to that. Or maybe it's kind of sad because people tend to like like queer parades and parties and things. But I'm looking forward to a day when it's not, like, necessary, necessary or or sort of the focus. I suppose, because you only generally get media coverage when you're wearing a giant headdress and walking down the road on a giant shoe or whatever. [00:44:30] I don't know. Yeah, if you still acquainted the desert. But what was my point again? Remember, you're looking. You're looking forward to a time when when that's what you see. I'm also looking to a time forward to a time when Fred Phelps and his whole family aren't around and getting media coverage. Fred Phelps is a can I say a douche bag on here. Fred [00:45:00] Phelps is a giant douchebag who lives in the States, and he runs this website called God Hates Fags, and him and his whole family run this church of people that go and protest at really random funerals about why God hates fags and things I don't know, but the the basically they just they're haters and they gone hate. And I'm looking forward to a time when they are not around slash They are [00:45:30] not getting media coverage that could be given to the queer kid wearing a head dress. A good way to put it. Um, just to end on a positive note. What's your favourite thing about being a Korean person in New Zealand today? Oh, are you even gonna do that? No, [00:46:00] I. I like being in it. I. I actually I. I like I feel a bit special and I like being in, Um I like I don't know. I just I just like being myself, I guess I don't really know how to I don't know how to describe it. I just I feel like I like I like being in a sometimes there is negative, but I like being in a minority group of people. And I feel like, you know, I kind of have a different perspective and, like, learn, like, know lots of really cool [00:46:30] people, lots of cool people in the queer community. And I appreciate lots of different perspectives. And I think being queer kind of helps helps me to be kind of more open minded and have different ideas about this stuff. OK, Yeah. Writing a giant show would be really cool if it was. If if anyone has a shoe and they want it to me for a short time, that'd be great. But mostly I like, [00:47:00] I like that, Um, this sounds really kind of frivolous, I guess. But I like that the fact that I had really weird style and and skill and and was kind of crap and stuff kind of translate quite clearly as quite cool. And so and so can we like badly fitting pants and actually I. [00:47:30] I kind of I kind of agree with that. Like, I feel like every time you go to a queer event, I feel like you can. It's kind of you can kind of dress how you want, and it's more kind of. I feel like people always. Often other people kind of worried that they have to wear certain things or wear high heel shoes. Or wear this and and or be fancy or wear this or you have to wear a dress for this thing. And I feel like in the queer community, it's more free and you feel like more able to be yourself kind of. And people are [00:48:00] kind of more yeah, extending off different things. And it's nice and like in the queer community, I like it when, um when, like you go to things and and yeah, and I don't know, just like quick kids have such good style and yeah and good hair and just can you describe some of the things that are good style [00:48:30] and good hair? I don't know. There's lots of it, like they always have cool coloured hair and they have piercings and like sweet ass tattoos. And like when girls have tattoos of those like old kind of pin up girl things, I always see some lady with them. It's really but like and like, there's this girl that works around the corner from my school and she's like she must work in one of the business buildings like, But she's always wearing the sweetest suits and they're, like, tailored so Well, I'm just like, damn, we have good style. Why can't we be [00:49:00] friends? I sort of like cool here. I'm just like, Oh, she had the coolest, like, bury suit thing the other day and it shouldn't work, but it does, and it's just like, damn girl.
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