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Well, I guess I sort of realised I was gay right from when I was very young. Um, sort of when I, you know, I looked at a man or a you know, as attractive to him and or looked at a female. And But I wasn't, I guess. And But I guess when I was young probably didn't to realise what it all meant and all that. And I actually didn't come out till about two years ago, and I'm 25 now. Um, [00:00:30] I guess it took me a while to sort of accept and come to terms with the fact that I was gay. Um, I'm sort of glad that I am. Now, I find that I'm a lot happier, sort of went through a bit of depression and that, and then when I sort of sort of finally came out and that sort of told everyone that I was gay, um, I felt like sort of a bit of weight lifted off me, and I was a lot happier. Um, pretty much my [00:01:00] everyone took it fairly well, Like my mum already sort of pretty much knew that I was gay. Um, as did sort of some friends that I worked with, I guess sort of having close contact with me and that I sort of picked up on the sign that I was gay even before I sort of said that I was, Um my dad was about the only one that didn't take it very well. It sort of, um, [00:01:30] thought that it was a waste and sort of thought that I'd chosen to come and go. Um, and I couldn't believe that you were born gay, so, um, but he doesn't sort of understand that, so we just I don't talk to him about it at all. He didn't at first. Didn't want to see me at all. Um, but now he seems to have gotten over that. One of my friends actually told him up and I think told him off and that I was his only son [00:02:00] on me, blah, blah, blah. You know, I should get over it and all of that. So he does, whether influence him at all. I don't know, but he seems to be right about it, but we don't sort of really talk about it. Makes a few comments about living a clearer lifestyle and the rest of it just tend to ignore it, Um, everyone else except me for the way I am, as I guess. But I'm not a different person to [00:02:30] who I was before I came out, so I shouldn't be treated any different. I sort of found it hard, like going through school and that because I sort of sort of wasn't out. And I guess I had a school friend come up to me one day and said, Oh, don't worry, I won't tell anyone. And I said what? And he said that you go and I just I sort of alright, he didn't really know what to say, but I guess it sort of [00:03:00] sort of see me on other guys or whatever and picked up on it. Um, so that was a bit sort of freaky. Um, I guess, looking back, I wish, but I perhaps had to come out when I was younger. Um may have made things easier, or I would have perhaps experienced more. Um, but I guess he can't change the past. You just have to look for the towards the future. Um but I thought I wouldn't [00:03:30] change who I am or being gay for anything. Enjoy being gay and wouldn't wanna be straight. Always knew I was gay, but just never did anything about it. Or I don't know if perhaps too scared or just sort of also not helping because I was perhaps shy as well. Um, I was just sort of, um I guess had sex with a few guys when I wasn't out. [00:04:00] Sort of, um, like, covering it all up and that and making sure no one knew and the rest of it. And then I sort of I guess there was just that urge there to To wanna come out and to want to tell people that I was gay and to not have to hide it. Um, And I guess it just and I spent so much time, I guess in the closet and and all of a sudden it just sort of speak. So I want to come out, and then I just basically [00:04:30] came out and yeah, I sort of came out and just bang and told everyone that I was gay and just started going out to go places and that, um so I guess, Yeah. I just guess it all built up over the years, and I just couldn't live more sort of hiding it and that. And I wanted people to know who I that I was gay and and everything. And so I just came out and did it. [00:05:00] I just sort of chatted to this guy on the Internet, and then he came down to a place where I was boarding up, because the the lady that I boarded with was away for the night. So we sort of talked for a while, a bit nervous, and then I guess we had sex. So it was just sort of, mainly a bit of all that sort of money, just sort of and that, um [00:05:30] and I just sort of afterwards I just sort of wanted him to pretty much sort of go straight away, and, um and then I change the sheets and all the rest of it. Um, so I guess the first few times, I guess so sort of enjoyed it, but then wanted to sort of sort of get them away quick. And that and I guess perhaps they sort of the people. And I guess also because I wasn't out, I didn't was frightened [00:06:00] of being, though coming home, so Ah, I mean, like, well, getting in court or whatever, so I just wanna to get rid of them quick. So I didn't get caught. Um, I guess coming out sort of in. Obviously, you don't have to worry about any of that anymore. So So it was sort of a while. Like when I first had a only about two guys and I was like, I don't know, six months or more, I think, than after that, and then I sort of came [00:06:30] out.
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