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We're here with Steven. Hello. Hello. What gender do you identify with? I identify as gay or homosexual. That sexuality. I mean gender, Male, male. OK, then you ask, What is your sexuality? Homosexual Dash Gay? Yes. And when do you When did you realise it wasn't really sort of a sudden overnight thing? It was just kind of you're aware of it, [00:00:30] but you just I didn't really classify it in terms of what society viewed it, as I just viewed it as a an attraction to men. And what I knew of gay, I thought to be something different, different coming from a slightly bigoted background. So I just assumed myself as male orientated as opposed to gay or homosexual, until I sort of searched in that area a bit more to find out more about what the community was, rather than just hearing one side of the story. How old were you when you realised? [00:01:00] Oh, well, um well, I never think it was sort of an age sudden realisation. It was just more of a woman. Weren't really that appealing to me in that particular kind of way. So in a way, you've always known it slightly. I suppose you could say that. How did you How do you feel about it? Um, you know, emotionally, I feel emotionally fine about it. The only problems I get, I just sort of find quite sad for the people who seem to hold them. [00:01:30] Did you ever felt that you had to keep it a secret? Well, I wasn't, you know, shouting it from the rooftops. I just kind of went along being who I was. And if I felt comfortable telling the person I'd tell them. If not, I wouldn't tell them. So I'm not shouting on the rooftop saying Yay, I'm gay. I think I've seen it in too many a musical. Have you came out of the closet? I suppose. Yeah. [00:02:00] I I Well, one of the first person I came out to was one of my, um, elders in a way. And we were just walking by a little cafe bistro, and she pulled me in and bought a bought a bottle of champagne and invited over all my other, you know, friends and everything. And we just sort of sat watching the sunset. Nice experience. Sort of verbally set, but I think to everyone who knew me, it was never really a secret. So, um, people always assumed [00:02:30] that you were gay. In a way. Well, I've always been this well, European or gay, The special child. Uh, I suppose you could say that. I think special is probably a little different. I mean, I don't feel any special than anyone else. I just think that I have more ability to express my thoughts and feelings to another person. How do they react? When you told the people that you were gay? Well, some people acted [00:03:00] with sort of great joy, sort of the verbalization realisation of something that you know, meant a bit about who I am and what it is. It is to be me. But at the same time, there were other people who sort of felt intimidated by the sort of power that one has to sort of break away from something. They've known their whole life as sort of being sort of small ost organisation in that kind of sense. But overall, I think it's been a really positive [00:03:30] experience. I didn't imagine that I could really be happier. How did you feel? Um, from their reactions. Hm? shocked and disappointed, shocked at all the good ones, for I didn't really see it that way until they set up and a little disappointed at the people who sort of didn't show such enthusiasm. For I imagine that saying something like you're gay or you're homosexual or you like guys or even you have a boyfriend. Shouldn't really, [00:04:00] you know, be something so definite that it means you can or can't socialise with them. Um, how do you, um, do you actually present yourself in a way that shows that you're gay? I don't understand the question Like, um, do you like to try? Make yourself stand out and as a as your sexuality, I don't intentionally, though I've been told that I can come across as quite [00:04:30] camp to some people. And some people think I'm quite masculine, so I'm not quite sure if I do it subconsciously or if it's just being me. So it has different reactions to different people. I think it's all sort of the eye of the beholder. OK, um, now we're going to go on to more personal questions. This is where I actually need the bell. Um, have you been in a relationship before. Mm. [00:05:00] Yes. Yes. How did you, um how did you meet other guys? Oh, I don't really know. I just sort of meet people standing in queues or just through friends. People just talk to me all the time. It's quite odd. That's certainly a first. Hey, I'm gay in a in a queue. It never starts off like that. No, no, no, not like that. But, um, that's something I didn't expect. Well, I'm [00:05:30] normally quite open to, you know, people. I mean it just because, you know, they're next to me in a queue or whatever. Just there doesn't sort of difference that Differentiate us. We're both human beings, and I'm sure we both have a lot of life experience in interests, you know, Um, did you have any support when you're coming out? Hm? I had lots. I know lots of people would have been supportive, but I sort of took a lot of pride in [00:06:00] just being able to sort of show that I'm a strong enough person that I never really needed huge amounts of support. It just sort of came as essentially. It just kind of boils down to people to people. And, you know whether they hold titles like parents, grandparents, doctors, psychologists, principals, you know, they're just people. And no matter what age you are, you're a person, too. And you shouldn't be treated any neg more negatively or positively due to that fact. [00:06:30] And because of that, when people have been negative, I never really seen it as too much of, you know, something abhorrent. Yeah. Hasn't you been out, um, affected your relationships, your past relationships in any way? Mhm. I don't really think so. I mean, my all my friends still treat me the same. The only difference is, is I can I feel more able to make funny jokes like I can't even drive straight? [00:07:00] How about, um, intimate relationships? Hm? I've always felt more nervous of introducing them to my life than mine to theirs. So I think that if you do have negative relationships with family, that's always a burden that you're going that if you are with someone that that's going to be put on them. And I think to a certain extent, that probably has inhibited [00:07:30] my relationships in some way. But at the same time, I'm very happy with all the relationships that I have have have had. How does your parents react to Um, when you came out? Oh, my father was trying to find the most politically correct statement to sort of say, That's fine. It's great without seeing too happy or [00:08:00] too shocked at the same time, which is beautifully awkward and knowing him like I do. I just kind of felt that in his way, that was his statement of approval, that he's happy for me with some of my other family members. It's been a little bit more strenuous, but on the bright side, they still sort of really care for who I am. And I think it's something nice to have, even if it isn't essential. [00:08:30] So do you take part in much, um, gay community activities? I suppose I do. I do some part time volunteer work in the area, and I have gay friends who sort of go to events like the big gay out coming up this weekend. But I don't really see it as going out to a sort of scene area. I just see it as a bunch of sort of friends. [00:09:00] In a way. I mean, we only we only really share one thing in common. When you get to know them, you sort of meet friends you share more or less with. OK, here's a really personal question that I always get bowed for. Um, are you a virgin? I can see why many people would consider that a personal question. Well, I'm not religious, and I don't consider myself a virgin. OK, [00:09:30] Yes. No bells. Have you gotten any abuse? Um, because of your sexuality or your gender identity, Ginger? Well, I suppose. But I find it a little difficult sometimes to see it as abuse. I think we all do. If it's a person close to us, we sort of associate them as a friend or guardian or something. And we sort of [00:10:00] because they are that to us, we sort of give them special rights. But when you sort of have relationships with people like I do where you are a person, if you're a bad person, I'm going to let you know that you sort of things people can get away with around you, sort of become what you allow them to do yourself. And if it's just a crazy person on the street. I don't really consider that abuse much for as much as a kind of cry for attention, For it so outrageous to, you know, sort of verbally say [00:10:30] something to anyone just because of you know, how they dress or what Even they associate with, um, Why do you think you personally think, Why do you think that, um, people abuse or gay bash or anything like that? I think part of it's probably the fact that they're not particularly altruistic individuals or they don't necessarily think for themselves, and they've sort of been raised in that kind of culture. In a way, it's truly tragic that we sort of still have that kind [00:11:00] of mentality with so many individuals. I think that a parent who sort of raises their child and instils that in them is truly wicked. And by the time you're 30 really, the issues of being raised shouldn't really be that much of an issue for you anymore. Can you tell me a bit more about yourself? What do you want to know? Anything This gives you like an insight of who you are kind of thing as a person, a bit old fashioned um, [00:11:30] you say that in an English accent. I didn't think I could pull up any accent if I tried. Um, your interests, What do you do for work? Do you study et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I studied last year and started working this year. I sort of feel as though when you're working to something and working towards your own goals, there's something really deeply satisfying about sort of reaching a goal you set for yourself, and I always set [00:12:00] them to far beyond what I think I can achieve. So I'm always, never endlessly surprising myself or ending up in some place completely unrelated to where I'm meant to be in the first place. It's quite fantastic, really. How about your interest? Um, I really like the arts, you know, cooking and music and stuff. But I don't particularly seek them out so much as just find them. Well, I'd like to thank you for having this interview with me. Is there any other comments that you would [00:12:30] like to make? I think I'd just like to say that anyone who happens to feel sort of pressured or, you know, under any sort of strain that you know, in almost any circumstance, depending on your age, you can get some type of assistance with whatever negativity you were dealing with. And no one, no parent, no one at all has any right to abuse you whatsoever. And that goes beyond physical violence but to [00:13:00] emotional as well. So being, you know, slagged in the street or being having things thrown at you or feeling unsafe or uncertain in your environment is not OK. And no matter what age, if you are in some type of abuse, there is some assistance for you, and I hope and don't worry, it does get better. I also just sort of think it's quite valuable to say that if a person does feel some sort of negativity towards [00:13:30] what they've been born as due to anything, I mean, other than the fact that it's unjust and hopefully will be altered with time is that when it comes to sort of, if you happen to like something, but you don't want to get involved with it because it's I'm not sure because you feel it's strange or stereotypical or associate. You is part of what you would associate with or even if you're not homosexual and you want to do something, but you don't want to do [00:14:00] it for it seems like then people would assume that other than the question that I'd ask, why would that matter? I find that ever since I have come out in one sense, I felt a lot more comfortable doing a lot of different things, like musicals, you know, and stuff like that. Just which I've been nervous of before because of the view people have of people doing that. And [00:14:30] just because you're, um, different to other people doesn't mean that you're promiscuous in any way or acting. It just means that, you know, you're more active. Hm. Thank you for the interview. You're welcome.
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