This page features computer generated text of the source audio. It may contain errors or omissions, so always listen back to the original media to confirm content. You can search the text using Ctrl-F, and you can also play the audio by clicking on a desired timestamp.
Hello. How are you today? I'm right. How are you? I'm good. Hello. Anonymous anonymous person today I am. OK, so can you tell us a little bit about yourself? Um, Mr Mrs, Let's go with. It's very obscure. Um, I'm in my last year of high school and I live in Palmerston North. It's a pretty average place. I've lived here my entire life. It's kind of boring. Kind of Wanna [00:00:30] get out, go somewhere else. Um, yeah. I'm thinking of doing a bit of travel next year because I can't really decide if I want to go to university or what to do at university. So I don't know. I like art and Japanese. I paint a lot. Um, yeah, it's pretty much about me and, um, likes and hobbies. Um, yeah. Um, I read a lot. Um, I pretty much live in the library, [00:01:00] and I pretty much have a library in my house. I'm surprised I didn't see you like on Tuesday or anything, because I was there a lot on Tuesday. Oh, yeah. No Tuesdays. I stay at school to do work because I'm I'm a hard core study. I have loads of stuff to do by the end of the year. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, what is your sex? I am female. Do you know? So you were here last week for QS? A. So you [00:01:30] know what gender identity is? I couldn't stay for the whole thing, but I have a general idea. So what is your gender? Gender identity? Um, female. I identify as female. Yes. You know, you know what it means. Um, what is your sexuality? Um, that's a bit of a tough one. Really? Um, there's a bit of a long story behind that. Should I go into the long story? Um, [00:02:00] a couple of years ago. Um, I, um I had a close friend and she was female, and things developed a bit, and I realised I was attracted to her, and we started dating. Um, and we actually went out for a year and a half, I think, Um, and after a few months, we sort of like became, you know, public with [00:02:30] it, and other people found out and stuff like that, and I think sort of from that, um I don't know. It just sort of came about everybody. Sort of. You know how people label you and they're like, Oh, so you're gay. And I'm like, Well, if by that you mean I'm attracted to girls, then I suppose, Yeah. And so, um, I sort of just went along with that because I didn't really care too much. What people? Um said, [00:03:00] um, but lately I've been I don't know. I've been thinking about it a lot more, Um, and like, wondering if that's actually true. Like, I know I am attracted to girls, but I'm not sure whether I'm attracted to guys at all as well. So quite quite curious, I suppose if you want to label it, yeah, if you could label it, that would probably be the best way to label it. Probably at this [00:03:30] stage at this stage, I I'm just figuring out I go pretty much no. OK. And what is your culture identity? Um, I don't really Ah, that's really difficult. I don't really have a culture. If that makes sense, I've always felt like everybody else. All of my friends around me, they have more culture than me. Um, I have some Maori friends and they have all [00:04:00] of their customs and their traditions and all of this and and like, culture is it encompasses so much You've got your food and your customs and your traditions and and just language as well. And I'm just I don't know, I'm a Kiwi, but that doesn't really mean a lot. I don't mean it doesn't really to me. We don't have anything special to us. I don't know. Mm. I don't know if that helps at all. So, uh, what is [00:04:30] your, uh, expression like, do you express yourself in a masculine way? Feminine way? Dark way? Uh, Tom Boy, I'm not actually sure. I was just talking to, um, some people before, and, um, I mentioned how I act very differently around different groups of people. Um, so I don't know. Sometimes I guess I act more in a tomboyish sort of a way. Um, God knows, I've been called butch enough times. [00:05:00] Um, but I don't know, um, but other times, I guess I can be quite feminine and sort of It's like in between. I guess so. I don't know. I'm not I'm a bit vague, I guess. Yeah, I think we all sort of act how I feel at the time. And however that comes across. I guess we all have our moments. Yeah. So when you, uh, got attraction to the skill was that the first time you [00:05:30] realised that you're attracted to the same gender? Um, it was the first time that I was aware of it, I think. And then afterwards, I started to question other things. Like thoughts that I'd had before. And I'm like, Was that? Yeah, I don't know. But it was the first time that I was really aware of it. What about before it? Sorry about before it. Um What? What do you mean? Like, um, [00:06:00] were you attracted to guys before you had that? That's one of the things that I started, like questioning, um, a lot because I went back and I thought about all of the people that I'd had, like, crushes on or sometimes they were fictional characters. Often they were fictional characters like, um, manga characters, anime characters. And if they were guys, they would always be quite effeminate. And, um, like, yeah, as [00:06:30] anime characters are. But, um, I suppose Yeah, I just took that as sort of another sign. Just like everybody has a Yeah, I don't know. It's like a lot of people have anime finishes in a way, not saying that you do have. Ah, and you know, a few people. Yeah. It's like a role playing, isn't it? More than you think. Anyway, um, off, we're going off topic. Um, actually, that's one of my hobbies. Um, but not the dodgy kind of role playing like the actual kind of [00:07:00] role playing. What type of anime do you like? Oh, that's too broad A question. Um, I watch any kind of anime. Really? Unless it's too confusing. You know how anime can just go crazy and, like, you don't There's no exactly, um, pretty much anything other than that. If it's got a decent lot, I'll watch it. Yeah, but something happened out of nowhere. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, um, [00:07:30] so are you out of the closet about being attracted to females? Um, my mom walked in on me and my girlfriend. We weren't even doing anything like dodgy. I suppose maybe sitting too close is probably what she got from that. And then she started asking me questions. Um, which I did my best to avoid. Um but it came out anyway. Um, and I always felt, like, quite comfortable [00:08:00] around my friends and stuff. So they knew pretty much from the beginning. I think, um, so pretty much. Yeah. Hm. Yeah. So although I haven't told my dad I, I don't live with him, though, so you'll send me out pretty much well to everyone accept that side of my family. Um, they're quite religious and I. I don't see them a lot because I don't live with my dad. Um, but I'm not entirely sure how it would go down. [00:08:30] Yeah, he's just edgy about it. Yeah, pretty much like, Oh, dear Dad, there's not much I don't know. I don't really feel like there's too much point getting into it because I don't see him that often. Like I can just put it off, and that's fine. So when you told your friends, what were the general reactions to it? Um, one of my friends was offended because I thought that she wouldn't approve because she was religious. Um, what did you tell me earlier? [00:09:00] But she she was like, what? What? Even I wouldn't I would never Yeah, she would never be against it or, you know, drop me as a friend because of it. Um, and all of my other friends, they were just really supportive. They didn't really care either way. I suppose so. You head of a support system? I guess so. Yeah. Yeah. So do you come to space that often? Um, usually every week. Except when I have loads and loads of work to do or, [00:09:30] you know, you pretty much live at school. What's your favourite subjects at school? Um, well, up until last year, it was definitely art. And then my art teacher left in boys high. Um, and she's like cheating on the school. It's It's true. It's really it's really like she's abandoned us and just ditched us for other people. But, um, and this year, I haven't got such a great teacher. Um and so I'm struggling a bit with that, but [00:10:00] I still enjoy it. Um, I'm sort of getting to that point where you get in year 13, that you are just sick of everything, and you want it to be over already. Um, but if I had to say, probably my favourite subject at the moment would be photography. Um, but yeah. So when you leave school, what do you want to do? Oh, that's such a hard question. Um, go go to, like, Auckland University study art or something. Not so much. Not a university. [00:10:30] Wellington University considered going to messy Wellington for a while, um, to study fine arts because I have a creative art school, and it's quite, um, it's well known and everything, Um, but both because of finances. Um, and because I didn't think I was ready to go next year. Um, I put that off for now. Um, so at this stage, [00:11:00] I'm working next year. So we're having more have a break, have a break from studying. And I think that will be really good for me because I just need a break and not smacking your head against a cocky wall kind of thing. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. So, um, you have been in relationships before, Obviously. How many relationships? Um, just the one. Just the one serious one. Yeah. Are you still currently with that? No, we we broke up after about a year and a half, so yeah. Would you like to tell us about that relationship? [00:11:30] Um, we started out as really good friends. Um, so it was like a good beginning. Yeah, um, we're still friends now. We, um just don't talk of all that often, but we We're still on good terms. Um, we Yeah, we were good friends. Um, she's a couple of years older than me. Um, and we had mutual friends as well. So we hung out quite a bit. Um, and we had common interests and stuff reading, writing stuff like that. Um, [00:12:00] and I think we actually started out. It sounds kind of cheesy, um, writing letters. Um um, and we were just, like, sort of sneak litters to each other every now and then. And it was really fun because nobody really writes these days, Not physically. Um, and in the process of that, I guess we sort of found out a lot about each other. And [00:12:30] I know things just developed. Yeah, pretty much to be a cliche. Um, yeah, we went out for a year and a half, I and I know we're good for about a year of that. And then, um, because she moved to a different city. Um, distance sort of took its toll, and then it didn't work out. Sorry. [00:13:00] Did it break up in a mutual way. Yeah, um I mean, I was really upset about it, but I was the one who brought it up and breaking up in the first place because I knew it wasn't working anymore with distance and everything. Like, it's only two hours from here to Wellington. But when you can't see someone, it's just Yeah, OK, it makes it tough. Yeah. So, uh, how do you meet other people in the LGBTI Q [00:13:30] community? Um, I come to closet space for one thing. Um, that's a big, big point there. Yeah, um, actually, it was quite hard to find it to begin with. Like I heard about it. And then I had no idea how to contact anybody or where it was or how to get to it or anything like that. Pretty much. Pretty much. It's not like they advertise in the in the bar here. The bar that we're into it looks like what a gay bar would look like. Pre lawful. [00:14:00] It's pretty, pretty low. You know how, um, Homosexual law reform law came into place in 1986. Not so much. And at 1986 it was made legal for a male to have sex, meaning that we we're allowed to be gay. Before that, it was it was illegal. So I guess clubs, Although, of course, [00:14:30] it wasn't legal for women because nobody could possibly imagine what they could do with each other. Well, that's what that's what Queen Victoria thought. Yeah, exactly. So that's why that was never Yeah. So this is what a club would look like if, um, prelaw form. Quite secret. Underground. Kind of not really underground, but nobody really knows where it is. Yeah, no one knows where it is. Advertisement. Yeah. Got a few minutes? Yeah. Um, So yeah. So [00:15:00] have you ever been abused because of you A six year old, too? Um mhm. Not so much. Uh, I don't know. I had a little bit of bullying when I sort of came out at my school. Um, and me and my girlfriend, like, were in public together. Um, and you know, the teasing name calling shit like that, Um, pretty immature stuff from young people. Um, a couple of times, like I was walking home [00:15:30] from school and I got stuff stones thrown at me and stuff like that but I sort of just ignored it and it went away. Probably not the best way to deal with things, but it It Yeah, got past it. They did too, I suppose. Literally. Oh, thank you for the interview. OK, thanks.
This page features computer generated text of the source audio. It may contain errors or omissions, so always listen back to the original media to confirm content.
Tags