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Cool. So where have you come from? For this, Um and are you in a group up there? Uh, yeah, um, extreme is the name and you come up with five others or four. Sorry. And what? So is your group, um, in a in school group or out of school group or just, um, just in general, they just meet, um, between four and six or from 4 to 6, [00:00:30] and yeah, it's pretty good. Easy going. A lot of support. Just need more people. And what's been like with, you know, queer and trans and coming out. And, um well, there's not so much trends. There's quite a lot of gay people because I was in the, um, me and one of the other boys was in the paper for coming out about it. And it wasn't until we went to a concert later that week [00:01:00] that, um, over 25 chicks came up to me, and we're like, Oh, well, I'm surprised about the article in the paper, you know, but that they're still in the closet and doesn't don't really want to come out about it, which was a bit sad. What do you think? What makes it kind of hard to come out. Um, the fear, I suppose, about how your mom and dad are going to react or if you're still gonna have the friends or if they're gonna leave your side or [00:01:30] Yeah. And did you Did you struggle with any of that stuff? Um, no, not really. Um, I come out when I was about 12. Who? What did you say? Um, told my mom and dad. Mom, Um, I liked the school at school and my dad didn't really like it. He still doesn't like it very much being a daddy's girl, but he's still OK with it. Just doesn't like the whole kissy thing [00:02:00] and stuff in front of him. Um, yeah, I didn't find it hard at all. My some of my family don't like it, but quite frankly, I really don't care what they think. They're not the ones that's gonna be my partner. They're not the ones that's gonna have kids with me. They're not the ones that love me in that way or not that I know of. So yeah to So what would you say to someone in and, you know, scared to come out [00:02:30] or, um, don't be afraid of who you are. Really? If you I mean, if you're gay, if you're straight, if you're bi, if you're lesbian, If you're, um, anything who cares what people say or think about you if the outcome of it is bad? So what? We just have to face that because they're going to find out some time. And the way your parents should find out is from the horse's mouth. Not, you know, your friend or, you know, [00:03:00] your daughter is a lesbian. No. Through someone else through yourself. And yeah, just live it up. Well, you can. Yeah. So have you had have you ever had negative reactions? Uh, yeah, when I was at college, Um oh, don't go by her because she's a lesbian. She's gonna rape you. That's what they're all about. Um, and those same people that teased me at school because of my sexuality are now [00:03:30] struggling with their own. And I've always believed that people that pick on other people about their sexuality, uh, confused about their own sexuality. And I always believe that because they're either jealous about something or they want to go out with you because you know, they might be hooking up with another guy, and this guy comes down and gets jealous because they're holding hands or whatever, but yeah, yeah, And what have [00:04:00] been some real positive things, like, are you? You're real proud of who you are and everything and all bloody oath. I'm proud, And I always will be right through till I get put in the in the in the casket. But I don't really want to think about that yet, but, um, I guess the easiest part for me will be when I have kids. I'll understand if they turn out like me. I'm not gonna you know, um, disown them. I'm not gonna love them any less. Or just [00:04:30] Yeah, they'll still be my heart. So what message would you give? Um, I guess straight. Parents or straight teachers or other students about, you know, young people that are or queer or gay, lesbian, whatever. What's important for them to know? Um, just I guess you should just They should really understand on what teenagers these days are feeling, especially if they're gay [00:05:00] or it's stressful enough, you know, crying and then yelling at yourself like, Oh, how do I tell them? How do I You know, how do I do this? How do I do that? And, um, you just try to understand And just think of it as if you were gay or if you, you know, just see this chick walking down the street and got a nice ass or something. I mean, what would you do if that was you? You know you wouldn't. Yeah. And [00:05:30] you should love your kids for who they are, not what they're gonna do in their life. I mean, because the next day they might top themselves because of the reaction you gave them. And and if that happens, well, you're gonna regret it. You'd rather them be gay, lesbian or boy or whatever than having to bury your own child. So, do you know any instances of of young people have taken their lives or, [00:06:00] um, yeah, my friend. He told his parents when he was about 16 that he had this fancy for this guy. He was a drag and just fell in love with him instantly. Told his mom Mom, I'm gay if you don't like it. Then he told his dad his dad disowned him straight away. And they both kicked him out of home. Both of his parents. And yeah, he he just took off and jumped the bridge and took his own life. [00:06:30] There's heaps more, but yeah, but you've had a You've had a pretty pretty good experience of coming out and everything. Yeah, I've I've had pretty good experience. I. I just told Mum and Dad and my mom said, uh, OK, she was a bit and about it. Dad doesn't like it very much, but it wasn't that hard for me because I don't really care what other people think about me and I never will. Cool. And how are you funding the so far? [00:07:00] Um, it's good. It's got a mean party tonight, but we couldn't have a couple of boxes. I have to get up and sing along and yeah, it would be pretty cool. Go sing some songs. Cool. Thanks for talking to us. This audio was brought to you by out there. For more information, visit WWW dot out there dot org dot NZ.
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